DEAR DEIDRE: I keep hoping a friend of mine will change from lesbian to heterosexual because I’m male and in love with her. Is that possible?
I’m 27 and she’s 25. We met at college in our teens and there was an instant connection for me, but she told me she was gay.
She has had many relationships but in between women we would get close, again and kiss and cuddle, usually when we were drunk. It felt incredible.
I really thought we had something special but when she was sober she’d remind me she liked women.
I’ve never met anyone like her. I’ve tried dating but other women aren’t the same.
So what do I do? Do I keep seeing her and torment myself? Or tell her our friendship is over?
I lie in bed thinking about her and, when I wake up, I long for her to be in my arms. I want to stop feeling so torn.
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DEIDRE SAYS: There’s obviously a connection between you but she has been clear she likes women.
While our sexuality is on a sliding scale and isn’t always fixed for our whole lives, many people do feel their sexual preference remains constant and you need to respect that.
You don’t have to end the friendship. But cooling things, to give yourself the space to meet someone who does want a relationship with you, would be wise.
My support pack, Finding The Love of Your Life, will help you.
