DEAR DEIDRE: I’M sharing erotic massages with a gorgeous escort – and I think I am falling in love with her.
It all started last July after the first lockdown was lifted. It’s the first time I have ever done this sort of thing.
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We went out for a meal on the first date and then spent the night together. Even though we didn’t have proper sex, we did have plenty of intimacy, which included giving each other erotic massages.
Despite the lockdowns, we have met frequently and actually formed a support bubble. It was an escort and client relationship at first but we have grown much, much closer.
We text and phone when we can’t meet. I really get the vibes that she might be in love with me but neither of us wants to make the next possible move.
I am 35 and she is 31. If we meet for a meal we always make the time to give each other a sexy and erotic massage afterwards, which we both find an amazing experience.
Tempted to cheat on your partner?
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We haven’t had full sex yet though. I don’t have the best record when it comes to relationships.
None have got this far before, so I am very shy.
I want to tell her that I have fallen in love with her and hope that we can be a proper couple. But I haven’t dared, just in case of rejection and ruining everything we already have.
I don’t want to lose her either way. Should I keep the relationship strictly on an escort and client basis or try to turn this into a proper relationship?
DEIDRE SAYS: She might well have developed feelings for you but she will also see you as a lucrative client. This woman could be playing you along.
I’m sorry to burst your bubble but she is unlikely to see you as a life partner. She is doing a job. But you need to have a serious talk and ask her what she wants from all this.
An escort gives you intimacy but it is nothing like the sex with a woman that you know well, care for and, most importantly, cares for you. It does nothing to boost your self-esteem – quite the reverse.
If your escort admits she does not see a future together, you need to be firm with yourself and rearrange your life to give yourself the best chance of meeting someone who wants to have a proper relationship with you.
My support packs on Finding The Love Of Your Life and Shyness And Social Anxiety can both help.
