DEAR DEIDRE: REGULARLY my lover texts his wife and he still tells her: “I love you”.
Am I wrong for feeling hurt or do I have good reason?
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We met online six months ago and began just talking casually at first.
He is 50, I am 24. He told me he is married but separated and they have teenage kids.
They are the reason he keeps on good terms with his ex and they speak often.
But he has not yet started divorce proceedings.
I refused to meet him at first because I felt like some sort of home-wrecker, but I finally gave in. We spent an amazing evening together. I was upset at the thought of not seeing him again but he called me the next morning.
I tried to tell my best friend but she just called me horrible names.
DEIDRE SAYS: He will be playing his own game. Saying to his wife, “I love you” is giving very mixed messages about the true state of their relationship. Are you sure they are actually separated?
Be ruled by your head, not your heart, before you get even more emotionally entangled. He is not free, nor even making moves to get divorced.
My e-leaflet Your Lover Not Free? will help you think this through clearly.
