In my mind, I am – and always have been – British. There is nowhere else I know as home and I have never lived in any other country.
‘Your application has been rejected as invalid’.
On 12 December last year, I was devastated to receive an email informing me that my settled status application had been denied.
The reason the Home Office gave was that the deadline had passed and I lacked sufficient evidence to justify the reason for applying late.
But the thing is, I had no idea my status was even in question until I started a job as a care worker and was asked to provide a ‘share code’: a code for migrants to prove their Right to Work.
This led me down a path where I’m now at threat of deportation – even though I was born in the UK and I have a British birth certificate.
Born in 2001 and raised in London, my Portuguese mother believed I was British, even if her and my father weren’t. She came to the UK in 2000 and had me and my three siblings.
Since birth, I’ve been registered with a GP and even had a little ‘red book’ – also known as a personal child health record (PCHR) that records my health information. I attended nursery and progressed on to school along with all my other British friends.
In my mind, I am – and always have been – British. There is nowhere else I know as home and I have never lived in any other country.
Following Britain’s departure from the European Union, my mother knew that she needed to apply for settled status. However, at the time, she was told by an employee at Wembley Civic Centre that it did not apply to me, as I was born here and had a British birth certificate.
So I thought nothing more of it.
But when I got a job as a care worker at the age of 22 last December, they asked me for a ‘share code’ and I had no idea what that was.
I thought my birth certificate would suffice as ‘right to work’ evidence. I also gave my Portuguese passport and proof of address, but was told by the employer that this was not enough.
I would have to start my life all over and the thought of that made me feel deeply depressed
This was the moment I realised I was not fully British – and so the nightmare began.
I learned that using a British birth certificate is only enough if you are already a British citizen, but because I do not have a British passport and have never had one, I am not – and I needed the Right to Work documents.
Even then, I thought this was merely an administrative hiccup that would be easily resolved: how could they question my right to stay in the country where I was born, raised and lived?
So I applied for the EU Settlement Scheme in December 2023.
When I got the rejection letter four days later, fear washed over me. Just like that, my identity and belonging were stripped away from me and my life began to fall apart.
Applying for a British passport seemed like the logical next step. I have never been outside of the UK so had never needed one up until now.
It was through this process that I was asked to provide documents from my mother that showed she had Leave to Remain when I was born in 2001. That would have been the Portuguese passport my mother used when she entered the UK.
Unfortunately, my mother has since renewed her passport and the Portuguese authorities keep all expired ones. Without this crucial piece of evidence, there was no way I could get a British passport and appealing the decision would be a very pricey (£140-£800) and long process.
After doing some research, it suddenly hit me. I could actually be deported.
This was hard to take. I have never lived in Portugal, I grew up in London and this is my home. I would have to start my life all over and the thought of that made me feel deeply depressed.
Being autistic, I tend to become easily overwhelmed and was unprepared for the toll this realisation would take. My mental health plummeted, my depression got worse and I struggled to get out of bed.
It felt like I had no hope of solving this issue.
To make matters worse, I lost my job due to the uncertainty surrounding my status, so I have been left with no means of supporting myself. I have lost my independence and have become a burden to my family.
I am terrified I may have to leave my home, my family and friends, and all that I have known for a country whose native tongue I don’t even speak and who cannot adequately support me with my mental health needs.
Decision-makers need to recognise the psychological, emotional and mental cost of their insensitive and inhumane immigration policies
I was lucky to have discovered the charity Rights of Women, who are supporting me to reapply for settled status. However, everything is so uncertain and there is no way of knowing how long the process might take or what the outcome might be.
The Government and decision-makers need to recognise the psychological, emotional and mental cost of their insensitive and inhumane immigration policies. We are not just numbers on a form; we are individuals with lives, livelihoods and mental wellbeing at stake.
Changes need to be made to ensure that people like me are better supported and not left stranded in legal limbo. According to recent statistics from the Migration Observatory, there are thousands of people facing similar struggles in the UK.
The Government must acknowledge the urgency of this issue and take concrete steps to address it. Failure to do so not only perpetuates injustice, but undermines the very fabric of our society.
My journey is not just a personal struggle but a reflection of systemic failures in our immigration system.
It’s time for change, compassion, and recognition of the inherent right of every individual to belong.
Until then, I remain in the shadows, fighting for my place in the country I call home.
Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing James.Besanvalle@metro.co.uk.
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