Watching the episode of American Horror Story: Delicate where Kim Kardashian was suspiciously missing from and when my family dog died: the two worst days of my life so far. Luckily, a third awful day will not be added to that list, as Kardashian’s character has returned to AHS: Delicate after last week’s drought. Suddenly, everything is right in the world again, at least for the 29 minutes of the one-hour time slot where the show was actually playing. (This week’s episode, the penultimate installment before next week’s season finale, ended 10 whole minutes before its scheduled airtime block on FX did.)
Yes, Kardashian’s colossal biotch of a high-powered Hollywood publicist, Siobhan Corbyn, is back, and we finally have a sense of exactly what wicked deeds she’s been cooking up this entire season. After helping her client-slash-bestie, actress Anna Victoria Alcott (Emma Roberts), rise to superstardom by making Anna’s indie film The Auteur into a surprise hit, Siobhan has set her sights on younger, fresh meat: Anna’s unborn child. Isn’t that just the way Tinseltown is? Always looking for the next big thing before the first one has even had a chance to fizzle out.
But we’ve had hints about Siobhan’s true intentions all season. After last week’s episode, which ditched everyone’s favorite character in favor of finally giving this season’s audience of 71 people some much-needed exposition, things had to be taken a little bit further this week. And by “further,” I mean they had to go completely off the fucking rails. Ryan Murphy might not be AHS: Delicate’s showrunner, but make no mistake: This is still a Ryan Murphy production through and through, and that means fumbling the landing entirely. At least in this week’s episode, we got the absolute most ludicrous homage to Rosemary’s Baby, scatological humor, and a lesbian kiss—all featuring Kardashian. I suppose if they’re going to sacrifice intelligent storytelling, the least they can do is make AHS: Delicate into a Scary Movie-level parody of itself.
