SHE is telly royalty after more than four decades lighting up our screens, gracing magazine covers and walking red carpets with her rock-star husband Brian May.
But Anita Dobson, 73, whose many TV, stage and film credits include playing EastEnders’ Angie Watts from 1985 to 1988, insists she has NEVER felt attractive.
She says: “My body and everything is completely out of alignment.
“I don’t feel fabulous. Absolutely not. I’ve never thought of myself as a good-looking woman. I’ve struggled to try to do the best that I can.
I think endlessly about what I would be like if I had cosmetic surgery and was brought up a different way, and if I was born into Hollywood.
“But at the end of the day you are given this body to live in, so make the most of it.
“I’m at peace. Why change anything? I’ve got a good career. A good marriage. I can stand up on my own two legs at the age of 73. So what am I changing for now?
“You have to come to terms with yourself. Be happy with the good things you’ve got and don’t keep looking on the other side.
“Just think, ‘I’ve got this, it may not be the best but if it’s good enough’, if you are a good person on the inside, it always comes out.”
Last week Anita was honoured at the Icon Awards, held in aid of prostate cancer charity Prost8, for her services to entertainment — TV shows including EastEnders, Red Dwarf, Split Ends, Casualty, The Bill and Strictly, and stage roles in Frozen, Chicago and Hamlet, and films Darkness Falls and London Road.
Her Queen guitarist and astrophysicist husband Brian May, who she wed in 2020, looked on proudly as she collected her prize. Yet she adds: “I’ve never felt good enough, never felt tall enough, pretty enough, clever enough, attractive enough, from a young girl until now.
“But I say, ‘Look, you’ve done well for someone with all those problems, so be grateful’. My mother always said to me, ‘Darling, if you don’t think you’re beautiful, we have faces in our family that will grow old well’.
“She said, ‘You won’t be a beauty and one day go, “Oh, I turned into a hag, what happened?” She said: ‘You will get used to your face and how to make the best of that face’.
“She is right, because she has always looked great, my mum. I think that was a lesson to me, to just grow old gracefully.”
Anita started to feel insecure about her image after she was fat-shamed by a boyfriend.
She says: “When I was young I went out with a boy, a good-looking boy, I was incredibly slim at the time and then I went on the Pill and of course you put on weight because they didn’t know what dose to put you on those days so we all got big bottoms, big boobs.
“We went on a date, and he said to me: ‘What happened to you? You got fat.’ I wanted to die. Now I think, so what if you put on a bit of weight? What I’m trying to say is, don’t worry what people think of you, do the best you can, and if you don’t like it move on.”
Anita met Queen guitarist Brian, 75, in 1986 after she had found fame on EastEnders, they married 14 years later, and she says: “I am very grateful to the man I’m married to, and for the career I’ve had, and friends I’ve had. Any of my little faults I point out, and Brian goes: ‘No, I love that.’
“So find yourself a man who loves you for who you are and not what he thinks you should be because you look a certain way.
“There is no secret to a happy marriage. Everybody has problems, hiccups in their life and marriage and career — things that make you want to walk away.
“But if you fall in love with somebody, learn to really love them. If you’re not happy you should go, and if you stay it means you want to work at it because it’s worth it.
“Life is chaotic and will throw you a curveball. So try and deal with things. All you can do is the best you can. If people aren’t happy, then find someone else.
“My worst fault is a lack of patience. I’m always in a hurry and I hate people that hold me up.
“But I’ve learnt to try and work on my faults, to listen more, to be more understanding.
“You don’t grow up and find you are a better person, you have to fight every day to be that person, and not slip into being irritable, losing your temper, being nasty. We can all do that, it’s not far away.
“As I’ve got older, when things are really painful I find that breathing helps. It’s like letting the steam out of an oven.
“I would love to meditate but find it difficult to find the time, so I try to find moments of silence. If I’m in a car I won’t have the radio on.”
She and Brian moved from London to rural Surrey and Anita reckons it has improved life because in the city she was always rushing around, while now they take time to observe nature, and be silent.
She says: “I’ve found the move very helpful, looking at the birds and the animals.
“That settles you down and it makes you realise we are all in this world and we all have the same problems and you’re not alone.
“You have to take it moment by moment and take life as you can. But always be polite and smile. If you meet people with a smile, they will smile back.”
Being in nature is one of Anita’s secrets to ageing well but she also credits quitting smoking — and her diet.
She says: “I’m a vegetarian, I’m very happy not to eat meat, I hardly eat fish — just now and again a bit of salmon or sea bass if I’m feeling a bit low.
“I don’t smoke any more. I don’t exercise at all really but I’m always busy doing stuff, up and down the stairs.
“I have good skin because my grandma had good skin.”
Last month it was revealed Anita is to join Doctor Who in the new series later this year — playing Mrs Flood, neighbour to the Doctor’s companion Ruby (Millie Gibson).
She says of the show: “I was thrilled to be on board.
“I just jumped at the chance to be on it. Ncuti Gatwa (who plays the Doctor) sat next to me in the read-through for the Christmas episode.
“He is adorable and gorgeous, very talented and a lovely bloke. He is going to be hugely successful.”
Now she says casting directors love her grey hair — explaining: “I’m a character actress now, because I’m older.
“People quite relish the fact I walk in the door with silvery-grey hair and wrinkles.
“They think, ‘Oh good, we don’t have to do too much’. That’s not to say that I don’t like dressing up, I do.
“No one ever suggested I get my nose or chin done, I think if you keep smiling and have a twinkle in your eye, people don’t notice the faults.”
