Rickson Gracie’s life has dramatically changed. Once a popular powerhouse in Brazil, known for his extremely technical jiu-jitsu, undefeated vale tudo record, and reputation as a fighting machine in the streets of Rio de Janeiro, the son of Helio Gracie now struggles in his Florida home.
Diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease in 2021, the 66-year-old legend sat down to chat virtually with MMA Fighting about his new book, Comfort in Darkness, in which he discusses not only life after the diagnosis, but how his mind and spirit were impacted by it.
“I already had symptoms like tremors, etc., when I was diagnosed, so this confirmation made me feel a bit lost, which was a new situation for me,” Gracie said. “With my subconscious already giving me the certainty that giving up is not an option — a disease, a financial situation, a physical situation, [giving up] is not an option. You must not give up, you must keep fighting through. With that mindset, I started studying and better understanding this new opponent I had in my life.”
Gracie lived in California for over three decades, living a good life with surfing and jiu-jitsu. Since the COVID-19 pandemic, and now affected by Parkinson’s, it no longer made sense to be in a “very intense” place like California. Gracie moved to the opposite coast, “where I have more time on the beach than the freeway.” The cost of living in Florida is lower, he said, and the “warm blue ocean and white sand” better suits a man that can no longer be on a surfboard.
Gracie consulted a doctor in the United States who prescribed him a pill and exercise three times a week, telling the Brazilian to “come back here in six months.” It wasn’t enough for Gracie, who felt like he was doing less than he could.
“I started looking for other doctors, healers, natural doctors, every kind of medicine and treatments,” said the jiu-jitsu icon, who started using CBD oil and fasting, and changing the water in his house for ozonated water to avoid ingesting “bad water.” On top of that, Gracie exercises every single day of the week.
“I created a notion of a strategic structure to deal with this opponent in a dynamic way, a positive way,” Gracie said. “I know I’ll die one day, I’m not afraid of that, but I don’t want to stop doing things that will put me in a better position. If I ask you what’s the most important thing to you today, what would you say? Your life. That’s the perfect answer because you must put yourself in priority to become the most important thing in the universe. Not because you’re selfish, and only care about yourself, but the better you are today, the better you’ll be as a father, a friend, a boss, an employee, a counselor.
“The idea that I can be in the best shape possible makes me happy because that way I can serve my son, I can serve my students, my friends, and make myself important in people’s lives. And that to me is what values the most. It’s the value of relationships, how much people will miss you and how much you mean to other people, it’s the worth of what you do. All that is what makes me feel alive, happy and motivated. I have to preserve this type of attitude and mindset to the end of my days. This is the great positivity you have to find — not in a competitive way, but in a martial way to deal with any opponent or adversary you have.”
Embracing the notion of mortality is something Gracie has always done throughout his life, even back when he was an active fighter. He once said that being OK with the idea that he could die in the ring helped him perform better as a fighter, and Parkinson’s brought that feeling back in a different form. The disease has given him different angles and perspectives in life as well.
“We go through good and bad experiences in life, and the bad ones usually keep hurting and marking you,” Gracie said. “I think that with spirituality you increase your capacity of being hopeful, faithful, and able to accept things. When you have a problem, you try to resolve that problem. But when that problem has no solution, you have to accept that problem and move on. One way or the other, you have to get rid of the problem.
“Forgiveness, for example. Forgiveness is something I started using every time more. Not that this forgiveness makes me go through the same mistake I’ve made before. If someone deceives me, I forgive that person so I no longer have bad feelings towards that person. But that doesn’t mean I’ll allow that person to go back to being part of my life and deceive me again. Forgiveness is about freeing myself from my own feelings. I don’t need to be tied to hate, anger, vengeance. I forgive so I can free myself from that problem, but not let that come back to me.
“The idea of spiritualization made me understand that Rorion [Gracie] — and other people that weren’t exactly what I hoped to be at a certain time in my life — could have free space, and I no longer have that obligation to have feelings. I’ve forgiven him, I accept, and now we talk to each other, we eat together, but we don’t discuss business anymore [laughs].”
In the end, Gracie feels grateful to live life the way he can. Tremors and other symptoms are part of his new reality, but the ability to see everything he’s accomplished both inside and outside rings and mats seems enough for the Rio de Janeiro legend.
“The positive [aspect] I’ve seen in Parkinson’s is that it really is an annoying and uncomfortable disease that will completely change my physicality,” Gracie said, “I’m losing speed, rhythm and coordination, but I look back and see what I’ve done with my physique, I’ve made good use of it, so I have no problem with what I plan on doing in the future. It has opened a spiritual side in me, a mental side that is very positive, and that’s the maximum expression of continuity in jiu-jitsu and martial arts. I remade myself. I was reborn from the ashes. I feel like a sick person today, but happy to be able to continue passing along the vision. I continue serving, I’m still happy, and I keep receiving great feedback from people, and I no longer use my [body] the way I used to. I’m living a new life in a way that enhances me, that makes me happy and positive. I have nothing to complain about, just be grateful.”
“I’m very grateful to being born in the Gracie family and representing jiu-jitsu with the importance I had,” he continued. “This was a part of my life that I’m proud and pleased to have represented. But this school of champions, of warriors, is something that we have to see as a martial art, not as jiu-jitsu the sport. And as a martial art, we have to be ready to face opponents in a very realistic way, whether on the mat or off the mat. This view that I have today of martial arts, created through my career and fighting opponents of all sizes and weights with no rules, it could be night or day or in a spontaneous challenge, it’s a preparation of a martial artist. When you’re ready, you’re ready to solve problems in the mental, emotional, spiritual or physical world. I feel like a spiritual warrior today.
“I feel ready to conquer — an opponent or happiness itself, because happiness moves. What makes you happy today is not what will make you happy in five years. The idea of evolution, who your opponents are and how you see life, when you have a martial artist’s vision, you become much more objective in the sense of who my opponent is now. Is it the stress of a payment I have to make? Is it my son’s education? Is it having to serve someone, or doing something I don’t want to do? There are many other ways for me to be a martial artist, I don’t need to be fighting. I have to be sure of what I want to achieve and have the ability to use the tools that were taught to me, such as patience, strategy, emotional control, breathing. These are invisible things.
“I call it invisible jiu-jitsu, it’s what I’m passionate about today, but it’s not because you have to believe what I’m telling you because it’s invisible, it’s invisible because you have to feel it. The difference between knowing how to breathe while dealing with my emotional problems is completely different if I didn’t know how to breathe. I would feel claustrophobic, breathing close to my heart, feeling anxious and nervous, unable to sleep. But with full breathing, diaphragmatic breathing, I can have the calm I need to face any problem without altering my heartbeat. I stay balanced, using this calm to be positive in my head, to think positive things, to have good results.
“Visualization, for example, is something that every elite athlete does. Thinking about a well-played game, a poorly-played game, what will happen if it’s a penalty shootout. You keep visualizing all the situations. I do visualizations based on what I have, on what I need to do tomorrow, if my Parkinson’s will be affecting me, what do I have to do? In other words, I’m very realistic and very concerned with meeting my needs at the moment, whether they are mental, spiritual or physical. And I’m very satisfied with the tools I have today to deal with these problems because whether in the physical field, in the emotional or mental field, or in the spiritual field, the right tools will give you the peace you need to remain optimistic and happy on your journey.”
