If You Keep Focusing On Yourself, The Relationship Will Come
Being single is definitely lonely at times. It can be so hard to not compare yourself to your friends who are already coupled up and settled down. And sometimes, you may even begin to wonder if there is something wrong with you and if that something is the reason why you’re single.
So, you start making a list of everything you think you are lacking, as well as all of the ways you are a bit too much:
- Too loud
- Too much
- Too awkward
- Not pretty enough
- Not disciplined enough
- Not smart enough
Etc. Etc. Etc.
Next, you map out a plan to address all of those flaws you believe need to be fixed before you can finally be worthy of the love you want.
And honestly? It’s all bullshit. Because there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Seriously, there isn’t. You’re single because you’re single. That’s it. End of story. It is simply a state of being, not an indictment of your character.
But mostly these personal development projects that you think will make you a better, more lovable person are a distraction from the real work and that work is repairing your relationship with yourself. The remedy to your pain is not going to be a relationship. It will be coming home to yourself.
Because somewhere along the way, you lost footing. You disconnected from your bones and misplaced your north star. You forgot who you are and all that you have to offer.
This is not to say you shouldn’t want love and partnership. It is merely a call to action to put your broken pieces back together and heal before you look for love. Otherwise, you will probably settle for less than you deserve.
Right now, your life is about finding yourself once again. Right now, your life is about coming back together and rediscovering all of those wonderful things that make you everything you are. Right now, your life is about showing yourself what you’re made of. Right now, your life is about you and you alone.
Keep focusing on yourself because the relationship will follow.