DEAR DEIDRE: AFTER my ex saw photos of me with my new, much younger girlfriend on social media, my insecurity got the better of me.
She sent some vile messages saying she never really wanted to be with me, but because I had money, she stayed.
She also said that she didn’t find me attractive.
She has ridiculed the age gap between me and my girlfriend, saying the thought of us having sex gave her “the ick”.
She completely got to me.
I’m 51 and my girlfriend’s 28. We’ve been together for a year and I’ve had moments of insecurity because of the age gap, but my girlfriend said it didn’t matter to her because she’s always preferred older men.
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She never gave me a reason to doubt her.
I just doubted myself and my ability to stay with a woman much younger than me forever.
The messages from my ex threw me and made me insecure, doubting my abilities.
I told my girlfriend and, while she was fine, I let it all get to me and we had an almighty argument.
I kept questioning her commitment to me, demanding constant reassurance, which she said she didn’t have to give.
She couldn’t get past my insecurity and eventually said my behaviour was a massive red flag and has ended our relationship. I’m gutted.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: All couples have insecurities, regardless of their ages, but a large age gap can bring different uncertainties to the fore.
Romantic relationships can really feel overwhelming, exhilarating and scary.
They need trust and a degree of vulnerability.
This fear of being hurt and rejected, especially if it has happened before, is a self-defence mechanism telling us it might happen again.
My pack Dealing With Jealousy will help you to manage these feelings in a less damaging way.
