FREDDIE Flintoff has told how his Top Gear car crash has left him reconsidering his career on the box.
The horrific accident two years ago turned him into a recluse, suffering from anxiety, nightmares and flashbacks as he had to undergo several operations on his face.
As a result, Freddie, 46, still feels nervous when meeting new people and can even feel compelled to leave social situations to burst into tears alone.
Talking on the day of the launch of Field of Dreams On Tour, Freddie seemed to hint that his “second chance” at life might not see him return to his TV work full-time.
Particularly as doing the show has reignited his passion for cricket coaching, and reinstated the confidence he lost through the crash.
He said: “I learned a bit about coaching – you’re coaching people not players, which is something I’ll take away, hopefully, in my career – whatever that leads to next.
“I suppose I found a confidence out there that had been knackered a bit in recent times. I always wanted to back into coaching, and I probably shouldn’t say it , but I fell into, like, a TV trap, you know?
“I was doing TV and moving forward, obviously, I’d love to do more coaching, I don’t know in what entity or work, and do a little bit of TV as well. It’s been a nice shift.”
The documentary sees Freddie deliver the good news that the lads are going to India on tour, months before his car crash. It then sees him meeting back up with them months later as his wounds are only just healing.
He said: “I’m a bit nervous about that as well, seeing them for the first time and being in front of them.
“It’s going to be strange because I’ve not seen them for so long. I think I’m like that with everyone I meet these days. There’s always that bit of apprehension, a bit of anxiousness and a bit of nerves.”
But he also uses it as motivation on his road to recovery. He says : “I’m looking forward to seeing the lads and being around them, I really am. I really am. This India trip is going to be just as much for me as it is for them now.
“I’m determined, I really want to go.
“All the way through this when I was in hospital I was thinking: “’It’s March’ I was aiming towards March. Then it was September, I’m aiming towards that.
“It’s always been a little bit unachievable. I think about it all the time. And I think about going, and how good it will be….and then I rewind.
“I’m thinking: ‘I don’t leave the house, hardly.’ Then I’ve got to get on that plane. I’ve got to be away for two-and-a-half weeks.
I’m not better than I was, I don’t know what completely better is.
Freddie Flintoff
“Its going from being in here for seven months to going to India for two and a half weeks.”
The four-parter, which starts next Tuesday, sees Freddie open up to fellow cricketer Kyle Hogg, admitting he thought he could recover within 12 weeks of the crash in December 2022.
Freddie had to be airlifted to hospital following the accident at Dunsfold Park Aerodrome, Surrey, as he filmed an episode of Top Gear with co-stars Paddy McGuinness and Chris Harris.
The three-wheel roadster he was driving flipped, leaving him with substantial facial lacerations, broken bones and damage to his teeth.
Instead, the married father-of-four spent most of last year behind closed doors coming to terms with his physical and emotional scars.
When Freddie eventually sees the lads again back in Preston they all throw their arms round him and tell him how much he’s been missed.
One of them asks if he feels 100 per cent and he replies: “Not really, I don’t know if I will again to be honest. I’m better than I was…I don’t know what completely better is.”
Later he continues: “We’re going somewhere which is incredible, and I’m trying to focus on the good stuff that’s going to happen.
“As much as I stand there and tell the lads about how great it is, there’s a bit of nervousness from my point of view.”
Freddie Flintoff’s Field of Dreams on Tour is on BBC One and iPlayer from next Tuesday, August 13, at 9pm.
