IT’S a phrase she’s heard a lot over her years of helping parents with difficult children.
But Supernanny Jo Frost has insisted she doesn’t believe people who say having kids “ruined” their relationship.
Instead, she thinks becoming parents just highlighted relationship problems they already had.
“I honestly don’t believe that children come into the picture and then they make everything worse,” Jo said in a video shared on Facebook.
“They come into the picture and they force you or not to pull your socks up, to start prioritising what’s important, to start getting on the same page with your partner.
“Because parents will say to me, ‘Actually everything was fine Jo, until kids came along and then kids ruined it for us’.
“And I’m like, no, you had problems already.
“Children highlighted what you needed to work on more.
“And if you ignore that, then you end up in a lot of trouble.
“That leads to a lot of friction and sort of unhappiness in the relationship.
“And when you have that, that’s a domino effect on your parenting.”
Jo added that when she’s been tasked with helping a family in trouble in the past, she’s spent “hours” talking to the couple about their relationship as well as helping them with their parenting approach.
“The hurdles in their own relationship impact how they parent the children,” she continued.
“Without a doubt, you can’t, that’s the grey elephant in the room, you can’t ignore that.”
She went on to reveal that the “immersive therapy” that she offers is a “full circle service, as such”.
Sharing the Reel on Facebook, Jo wrote: “Make no mistake, your children are the spiritual growth you needed.
“They picked YOU!”
And the comments section of the Reel quickly saw people weigh in on Jo’s thoughts, with one writing: “She doesn’t sugar coat anything. Great words!”
“I say that adding children to your family is like putting a magnifying glass on your life,” another added.
“What is good gets better, what is bad gets worse and what you’ve been ignoring gets in your face.
IT was once one of the most popular programmes on TV. But what happened to Supernanny once it was taken off air - and where is Jo Frost now?
The first episode of Supernanny was broadcast on Channel 4 in 2004, with the first series reaching almost five million viewers.
Former nanny Jo’s no-nonsense approach and incredible results won over those tuning in, with many keen to try out her tips and tricks in their own lives.
It aired for five seasons, coming to an end in October 2008.
Supernanny was also adapted for multiple foreign countries, including America – which also had Jo at the helm.
A follow-up show, Jo Frost: Extreme Parental Guidance, ran from February 2010 to August 2012.
Family S.O.S. with Jo Frost aired on the TLC channel in the States in 2013, while Jo hosted ITV show Family Matters in 2014.
A new season of 20 episodes of Supernanny aired in 2020.
She was signed up for Australian TV show The Parent Jury in 2020, but the Covid-19 pandemic meant she couldn’t travel and the show proceeded without her.
While she’s stepped back from her television career since then, Jo continues to help families privately, and also shares her parenting advice on her various social media pages.
She has also written six books on parenting.
Jo lives in Orange County, California, with producer husband Darrin Jackson.
“You either use that opportunity to figure your s**t out or you blame your kids and traumatise them.”
“I want to see some Where Are They Now for some of those people on your show!!!” a third admitted.
“How did those kids turn out??
“I know some of those parents are divorced!”
“Children come out innocent and sweet and loving,” someone else wrote.
“So, what they become is a product of their parents.”
But others disagreed with what Jo was saying.
“What a load of toss,” one wrote.
“A good relationship that decided to have children co parent, manage the children and have date nights is wonderful (I have that).
“It’s obvious she doesn’t want children, but she needs to see how small minded she is.”
“She hasn’t had kids so…” another said.
While a third commented: “I like her but it’s kind of weird being a child expert and not having any children.
“As all of us parents know, it’s not something you really understand until you have a kid.”
