DEAR DEIDRE: I GET frustrated and angry with myself when I can’t climax with my partner. I’m a lesbian and we’ve been together a couple of months. I’m 28, she’s 27. When we are in bed I get to the point of orgasm but then I suddenly lose it and I feel like a failure. […]
DEAR DEIDRE: I GET frustrated and angry with myself when I can’t climax with my partner.
I’m a lesbian and we’ve been together a couple of months. I’m 28, she’s 27.
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When we are in bed I get to the point of orgasm but then I suddenly lose it and I feel like a failure.
She is very understanding but I feel incomplete.
I can make her orgasm every time we have sex, but I rarely manage the same.
She cooked a romantic meal last weekend, with flowers, candles and wine.
It was a lovely evening but when we went to bed, I couldn’t reach orgasm, and I feel I let her down.
I have always had difficulty with orgasm but it has been amazing the few times I have achieved it with her.
DEIDRE SAYS: Good sex is about far more than reaching a climax. Taking pleasure in each other’s bodies is equally important.
Getting hung up on orgasm and fretting about it can cause the very thing you are worried about – not climaxing.
The key to this is understanding your own body and practice makes perfect so spend some time bringing yourself to orgasm alone. Once you have mastered that, you can show your girlfriend the way that works best for you.
My e-leaflet Women And Orgasm will help you work out exactly what does the trick. Then you can show your partner.
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