DEAR DEIDRE: I HAD a mind-blowing threesome with my gorgeous colleague and her boyfriend. Now I’m stuck in a love triangle and not sure who to choose between my wife, my colleague and her man. We have been married nearly 20 years and until the last 18 months or so, our relationship has always been solid […]
DEAR DEIDRE: I HAD a mind-blowing threesome with my gorgeous colleague and her boyfriend.
Now I’m stuck in a love triangle and not sure who to choose between my wife, my colleague and her man.
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We have been married nearly 20 years and until the last 18 months or so, our relationship has always been solid and loving.
I am 44 and my wife is 42. We used to have a very active sex life but a cancer scare knocked her sex drive. Mine, on the other hand, is still as high as ever.
I feel I am too young to be always wondering when we will be intimate again. She knows how I feel and it has put a real strain on our relationship.
She didn’t come to my work Christmas do with me as she was feeling unwell. A female colleague I’ve always liked introduced me to her boyfriend.
We spent the evening together and all enjoyed ourselves. He caught my eye as much as her, as he is a fit, good-looking guy. They are both in their mid-twenties.
At the end of the evening we shared a taxi and they invited me back to their flat. One thing led to another and we ended up having a passionate threesome.
We have met up twice, since, in the past couple of weeks. This has been the best Christmas ever for me. I met with just her last night, as he is with his parents. Again, the sex was amazing.
I told my wife an unexpected work problem had cropped up but I think she suspects something isn’t right. We had sex over Christmas and I was a lot kinkier than she’s used to. She asked what had got into me.
We have spent so many years together and part of me wants to make our marriage work. But do I dive in and choose my young colleague, who is everything and more than my wife used to be?
Or maybe her boyfriend, who has opened my eyes to the joys of gay sex?
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DEIDRE SAYS: You may feel this has been a Christmas to remember but you cannot have your cake and eat it.
By carrying on as you are, you are putting your marriage at risk. When your wife works out what is going on, as she almost inevitably will, she might make the choice for you. She could find it hard to forgive and forget your betrayal.
Your young colleague is at a different life stage and almost certainly isn’t looking for serious commitment. She and her boyfriend are probably just experimenting and enjoying having a bit of fun. You have a lot more to lose than either of them.
Think carefully before you throw away your years of happy marriage and likely end up getting hurt.
Your wife has survived a terrifying experience and deserves your support. That will help her start feeling like her sexy former self. My e-leaflet Reviving A Woman’s Sex Drive can help.