DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my wife and I met two other couples for sex, she had multiple orgasms in what I can only describe as an orgy. It has left me feeling like she’s been faking with me as I’ve never been able to give her more than one orgasm at a time. I am 48 […]
DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my wife and I met two other couples for sex, she had multiple orgasms in what I can only describe as an orgy.
It has left me feeling like she’s been faking with me as I’ve never been able to give her more than one orgasm at a time.
I am 48 and my wife is 46. We met after both our first marriages ended in divorce. I’ve got two sons aged 25 and 23 who live with their mum. My wife never wanted children and says I am enough for her.
We have always had a very healthy love life and have sex as often as we can. But keeping up the variety is difficult.
It was my wife who suggested we try swinging. I agreed but with some reluctance, so we joined a site to meet other couples and see if we could spice things up a bit.
We ended up meeting two fantastic couples about our age.
At first it was all very awkward and strange but we soon became more confident. We met the couples separately a few times before finding ourselves all together one night. There were orgasms aplenty for everyone and my wife seemed to really be enjoying herself.
The worry for me is that she seemed to be enjoying herself too much and had multiple orgasms that night.
It has made me wonder if our sex life has all been a lie and she has been too embarrassed to say anything.
Either that or she doesn’t find me attractive.
It has put me off even undressing next to her now. While her confidence has been given a huge boost, mine has simply gone the other way.
She can sense something is up but I am trying to get over it.
We always thought she lacked confidence but maybe it is me that is insecure and not her after all.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Your pride has been dented but do not see yourself as a sexual failure.
Your wife may have found it easier to orgasm then just because she was feeling like a naughty, sexy woman and not a dutiful wife.
You are happy together and your wife has not complained about your sex life.
But it can be a challenge to keep sex exciting in a long-term relationship.
It is best to stop involving others in your sex life.
What starts out as being a bit daring generally ends in misery for one or all of you. Unlike the fantasy, reality has consequences.
Tell your wife that meeting up with others for sex has to stop.
But ask if there are any changes needed in the way you make love to bring her greater pleasure.
My e-leaflet 50 Ways To Add Fun To Sex will help spice things up without involving anyone else.
Got a problem?
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