DEAR DEIDRE: JUST six months from now, I should be getting married – but I am wondering if I have made the right decision.
Our parents agreed that this guy and I should get engaged but we haven’t met yet. We video call. I am 23 and he is 25.
I was happy about it as he seemed such a nice guy at the start of our relationship. Now I am not so sure.
He often criticises the way I look and what I am wearing. He wants me to wear make-up which I don’t like doing except on special occasions. He wants me to take my scarf off to show my hair.
I don’t always say I love him when replying to his texts. He complains about that, too.
If he really loves me then I feel it should be for the person I am.
DEIDRE SAYS: You are right. He is not showing signs of loving you for the girl you are, only for the girl he would like you to be.
That is no basis for marriage and a lifelong relationship. He will undermine your self-confidence.
Arranged marriages can work very well but best tell your parents you’ve realised this guy isn’t right for you. I hope they will understand.
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