DEAR DEIDRE: I CANNOT use urinals in front of anyone else and it stops me enjoying the company of other people for a drink or socialising.
I am 55 and have had this problem for years but never told anyone.
I am too embarrassed to let on even to close friends or family, although I have been married to a lovely woman for 29 years and we have two gorgeous grandkids.
I get so depressed and wish I could just jump at the chance to go out with other couples for the evening.
My wife never complains but I know she would like that too. I do not even understand my problem. It just seems weird to me.
DEIDRE SAYS: Chances are that an incident in childhood set up tension for you around using public toilets.
This has created a condition called paruresis.
Share your worry with your wife. Then get expert help.
The UK Paruresis Trust offers support and workshops for shy bladder syndrome (ukpt.org.uk).
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