The holidays are over, and the new year is here. Most of us are still recovering from the frenzy — wrapping paper on the floor, leftovers in the fridge, and maybe a pile of thank-you notes waiting to be written.
But before we dive headlong into resolutions and routines, let’s take a moment to reflect on something that often gets lost in the shuffle: gratitude.
Gratitude isn’t just a polite thing to practice — it’s the secret sauce of meaningful relationships. It’s how we honor the thoughtfulness of others and how we cultivate a sense of joy and connection that can carry us into the year ahead. Let’s talk about why it matters and how we can make it part of our daily lives.
We all know that giving feels good. But what we often forget is that gratitude—the kind that’s heartfelt and intentional—makes giving even better. Think about the last time someone truly appreciated something you did for them. Maybe it was a thoughtful gift or a gesture of support during a tough time. When they expressed genuine gratitude, how did it make you feel? Chances are, it wasn’t just nice—it was energizing. It made you want to keep giving.
Psychologists have studied gratitude extensively, and the results are clear: gratitude makes us happier, healthier, and more connected. It strengthens relationships and builds trust, which is especially important as we navigate the complexities of modern life. But here’s the thing—gratitude isn’t just about making the recipient feel good. It transforms the giver, too. When we take the time to reflect on what we’ve received, it reminds us of the abundance in our lives and shifts our focus away from what’s lacking.
One of the most overlooked aspects of gratitude is recognizing the thoughtfulness behind the gifts we receive. Too often, we focus on the gift itself — its size, value, or usefulness — without considering the intention behind it. This is where we miss the magic.
I remember a Christmas years ago when one of my kids gave me a hand-drawn card. It wasn’t perfect, and it certainly wasn’t expensive. But what touched me deeply was the effort and thought they put into it. They had drawn my favorite things, written a message that showed they really knew me, and presented it with pride. That card wasn’t just a piece of paper — it was a window into their love and care for me.
Thoughtful giving, whether it’s a physical gift, a kind word, or a moment of time, deserves to be acknowledged. When we recognize and appreciate the intention behind someone’s actions, we strengthen our bond with them. We say, “I see you, and I value what you’ve done for me.”
So, how do we get better at showing gratitude? It starts with being intentional. Here are three simple ways to make gratitude a daily habit:
Write a thank-you note. Yes, this is old-school, but there’s a reason it works. A handwritten note shows effort, thought, and sincerity. Instead of just saying “Thanks for the gift,” take the time to explain why it mattered to you. For example, “Thank you for the book you gave me. I’ve already started reading it, and it’s exactly what I needed to kick off my year.”
Say it out loud. Sometimes, we assume people know we’re grateful, but hearing it makes all the difference. Whether it’s a quick phone call or a heartfelt conversation, express your thanks directly. Be specific: “Your encouragement during my big presentation meant a lot to me. I couldn’t have done it without your support.”
Reflect and share. Take a moment to reflect on the gifts you’ve received — both tangible and intangible — and share those reflections with others. Maybe over dinner, you can talk about the things you’re grateful for and why they matter. This not only reinforces your gratitude but also inspires others to think about what they’re thankful for.
Gratitude is like a muscle. The more we practice, the stronger it gets.
Here’s where gratitude gets even better: it’s not just a reaction to the past; it’s a launchpad for the future. Starting the year with a spirit of gratitude sets the tone for everything that follows. It helps us focus on what we have rather than what we lack, and it encourages us to give back in meaningful ways.
One of the best ways to honor the gifts we’ve received is to pay them forward. If someone’s kindness or generosity made a difference in your life, look for ways to do the same for someone else. It doesn’t have to be grand. Small acts of kindness — a thoughtful email, a word of encouragement, or a cup of coffee — can have a ripple effect that goes far beyond what we imagine.
Another idea is to make gratitude part of your new year’s resolutions. Start a gratitude journal where you jot down three things you’re thankful for each day. Or set a goal to write one thank-you note a week. These small habits can have a big impact on your mindset and relationships.
Gratitude is more than a nice idea — it’s a powerful force for good. It reminds us of the people who make our lives richer, the moments that bring us joy, and the gifts we’ve been given that can’t be measured in dollars. As we begin a new year, let’s commit to practicing gratitude in ways that honor the spirit of giving and create a foundation for deeper connection and joy.
So, here’s my challenge to you: take five minutes today to thank someone who’s made a difference in your life. Write them a note, send them a text, or pick up the phone. Let them know that their gift, whatever it was, mattered. Because when we practice gratitude, we don’t just honor the giver—we become part of the gift.
Patti Cotton serves as a thought partner to CEOs and other business leaders to help manage complexity and change. Reach her via email at Patti@PattiCotton.com.