"Household products that don't break within the first few years of use. My mom's wedding cookware is still going strong 25 years later, but whenever she needs new pans, they start flaking Teflon into the food within a few months."
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"The acronyms. Don't say 'lol.' It feels like you're mocking me!"
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If you can't make scrambled eggs, I don't know what to tell you.
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"My turn." —You when your kid pulls out laser tag
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Including a glow-enhancing lotion, a luxurious fleece blanket, and a tennis bracelet that'll have everyone believing you've got a Tiffany-level budget.
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Whether you're dealing with skin concerns, tangled hair, or slightly embarrassing bodily issues — this lineup of gems will deliver the results you need.
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"Unless we teach the truths of our troubled history in our school systems, our garden can’t help but be stunted; if we rise to the challenge, imagine how lush it could be."
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If you think you're smarter than the average American...now's the time to prove it.
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It's your dogs' home — you just live in it (comfortably, thanks to these picks).
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A "floating" mug, a book-shaped flower vase, and a wine-pouring handbag walk into a bar...
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"A long time ago, a friend told me, 'It's not your business what other people think of you.' It was like a light bulb went off in my head."
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"NBC is currently thawing Steve Kornacki like Mariah Carey every winter."
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Somebody please tell this reviewer-beloved hybrid knife and cutting board it didn't have to flex *that* hard.
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"In Prince's song '1999,' the actual lyrics are 'There’s a lion in my pocket and, baby, he’s ready to roar.' What I sang was 'There’s a lime in my pocket and, baby, he’s ready to roll.'”
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Like one of these Swedish dishcloths that equals *15* paper towel rolls so you can save $$$ while also saving the environment.
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I could have gone my whole life without learning why graham crackers were invented...
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"They are indeed the enemy from within."
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Get your living space clean with these helpful organization essentials.
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In fact, there are some major benefits to nuking your favorite ingredients.
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Diagnoses in people younger than 55 have nearly doubled since 1995.
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Including the purple shampoo that's putting in extra credit and also taking night classes.
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The Last Week Tonight host dreamed of a world where he wasn't "giving a sh*t" about the former president’s antics and urged viewers to make it a reality.
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*Checks watch* Welp, looks like it's time to load your cart with the famous Bojangles' seasoning, a half-pound Reese's, and a $5 rollerball that smells like vanilla and freshly baked cookies.
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"We're just supposed to like sit here and work?" —@straussanator
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"Prepare for a week of non-stop libbing out."
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