Kate M. moved from San Diego to Salt Lake City due to high living and childcare costs, but she misses California's weather and cultural diversity.
Denis Tangney Jr/Getty Images
Kate M., 33, couldn't afford to live in San Diego anymore as a soon-to-be single mother on a $ 150,000-a-year salary. After just under three months of living in Utah, she's already planning to move back.
Kate, whose identity was confirmed by Business Insider and asked to use her first name and last initial for privacy reasons, has a six-figure job in the pharmaceutical industry, though she's been stressed about money after more than a decade of pursuing higher education in California. She fell in love with San Diego, admiring its weather, food, and beaches, but she couldn't make it work financially while raising a kid.
She settled on Salt Lake City, which in recent years has become a business and tech hub. The city has a lower cost of living and cheaper childcare costs than San Diego, but it didn't have the cultural diversity or weather she desired. She also said some prices, like grocery costs, were comparably expensive. She's already gearing up to move back to San Diego once her kid is older and she's more financially stable.
"I am homesick every day and hope to make it back when my child starts school," Kate said.
Kate grew up in Arizona but moved to Los Angeles for college and grad school. After finishing her Ph.D., she landed a remote job in the pharmaceutical industry. She and a friend decided to leave Los Angeles, which she didn't like because of the traffic and dirtiness.
They both fell in love with San Diego and moved together in 2022. Kate was making about $150,000 a year at her job, though she had few investments or retirement savings since she was in school in her 20s.
"San Diego has definitely been my favorite place I've ever lived," Kate said. "It has such amazing food, and the water, at least where I lived, was super clean. I felt really safe for the first time in a long time because LA was not the safest place to just be walking around exploring."
Kate had just exited a relationship, but she knew she wanted to have a kid. Her doctor recommended she go through the IVF process as a single mother, which cost an "exorbitant" amount of money, she said.
She knew she wouldn't be able to afford to stay in San Diego with her kid, who is expected in August. She couldn't find full-time childcare options for less than $2,500 a week, not counting pay for backup childcare on sick days or holidays.
She and her friend each paid half of a $2,800 a month two-bedroom apartment, which was over $3,000 with utilities. She described it as a "very subpar apartment complex," and she said she would have to take over the whole lease since her friend didn't want to live with a baby.
"If I did that, it would have eaten almost half of my take-home pay after putting toward retirement and savings," Kate said.
She chose Utah because of its nature and family-friendly environment. A few years earlier, she took a road trip to South Utah and enjoyed its "stunning beauty," noting she could live in a neighborhood near hiking trails. She also determined that living costs would be reduced by a few hundred dollars a month.
She found a three-bedroom townhouse in May with an attached garage for $2,600 a month, including utilities, where she lives alone with her dog. She hired an au pair for $800 a month who also helps with housework. Her boss accommodated her move, and her pay didn't get cut despite the lower cost of living in Utah.
"I won't have to change any savings or 401(k) investing rates after the baby is born now that I've moved," Kate said.
Whereas she said she paid between $120 and $170 a month on her electric bill in San Diego, she's paid between $40 and $60 in Salt Lake City. After moving to Utah, she sold her Prius and bought an SUV, and she said filling her tank is about the same price even with way fewer miles per gallon. However, she said grocery and restaurant prices have been comparable.
She said living in Salt Lake City has been the safest she's felt. She rarely worries about coming home late or navigating the city. She's also looking forward to kayaking in the lakes near her home after her baby is born.
It's taken her some time to adjust to the smaller-town feel of Salt Lake City, though she said the people are very friendly and more willing to help her with tasks like moving or getting around. She's made some friends in Utah, though most of her friends are still in California.
Kate said some parts of Salt Lake City haven't come close to San Diego. She said the food was "infinitely better" in San Diego with much more variety, and San Diego had many more cultural and entertainment opportunities. In San Diego, she lived 15 minutes from the beach, which she said kept her sane after a stressful day.
"Utah is really pretty, but the weather can be extreme sometimes," Kate said. "I might have beautiful views to go hiking, but I'm not about to go hiking in 90-degree weather, so it stops me from spending as much time outside, from being able to do those free activities that I was able to do in San Diego."
Despite the mountainous terrain of Utah, Kate is sure she will return to San Diego in a few years once her kid is older and her salary is higher. In 2025, California will roll out free transitional kindergarten programs — a "free year of childcare, essentially," she said. She hopes to raise her salary to about $200,000, which she feels would be enough to live more comfortably in San Diego.
"The people in SoCal feel like my people, and I feel out of place here in many ways," Kate said. "I've had people ask me where my husband is before asking me my name. California is more liberal, and I don't have to explain my life choices to strangers over there. I miss my community, and I miss the perfect weather that made it possible to spend every day outside."
Have you recently moved to a new state? How does it compare? Reach out to this reporter at nsheidlower@businessinsider.com.
