Happy 34th bb.

Ordained by the blessed womb and Holy Spearit that is Lynne Spears’ vagina, Britney Jean Spears was basically immaculately concepted because she is Godney, bitch.

For 34 years now, the woman known simply as "Godney Jean" (or Brenda Joan -- long story) has been slaying your faves, flipping her hair, and forgiving your sorry ass sins.

Via plumkat.tumblr.com

Christians never even stood a chance.

Via fuckinglovebrit.tumblr.com

In her 34th year, Britney Spears has taken to Instagram like your problematic aunt has taken to Facebook.

Instagram: @britneyspears

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