Flickr / whologwhy
Every month I work with dozens of young people from around the globe who have no idea what they’re doing with their lives (truth be told, most of us have no idea what we’re doing, yet we’re still here, doing it anyway), and I spend half an hour once a week telling them everything I know.
I find a lot of common threads in these conversations and want to share my top takeaways with the hope they may help more people than those who choose to step into my virtual office.
Here they are, just 7 key words, and I hope they stick to you and start transforming your life, too.
Most of my dear clients have no idea what they want. Some have a story they tell themselves about what they’re doing or what they’re planning to do next, but really they have no idea what they REALLY want.
What we really want can usually be identified once we stop censoring ourselves, trying to come up with an answer that sounds prestigious or glamorous or reflects what we think is economically feasible or what our family wants. I tell everyone: get all those things out of your head and then give yourself to the count of three to answer as quickly as possible “What do I want in life?” and 9 times out of 10, that’s your answer.
Until you know what you want, no one else can help you get there. Everyone wants to help. If you have a dream, everyone will get behind you. If you know what you want, you’ll find a way to get it. But the first step starts in ruthlessly identifying what that is.
If you still can’t come up with what you really want out of life, a good place to start is by examining what you’re scared of. I strongly believe that fear tells us what we should be doing and the most successful people proceed directly into what scares them.
Like most humans, everyone I work with is very scared of something, of many things actually. Instead of backing down in the face of those things, we tackle them head on. We look at it like, this is a lot of good stuff to put on your radar and start learning about how you roll in the fear zone.
Go where you’ll grow, and you’ll grow most when you’re really freaked out about something.
If that doesn’t get the ball rolling, look for opportunities to give. What do I have that I can share with the world, regardless of monetary compensation? What can I teach others? Where can I volunteer this week? Where can just my physical presence be a gift to someone in need?
Most unhappy people are living selfish lives, without looking at the simplest question of all: what can I give to someone else? Today. Now. Whenever you feel lost, give, share, and love!
