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I’m worried my girlfriend bought a sex toy because I’m not big enough

Man in jeans with naked torso holding purple silicone vibrator, concept of adult games, stimulation

DEAR DEIDRE: MY girlfriend’s sex toy is three inches longer than me and I’m scared that she bought it because I can’t satisfy her sexually.

I saw she’d had an email about a delivery from a sex website and I thought it was something for me but she didn’t give me anything remotely sexual for Christmas.

My girlfriend is 24 and I’m 27. We’ve always had an exciting love life and I thought she only had one vibrator.

Last weekend when I asked her for sex at the weekend, she said she had already had her pleasure.

With a grin on her face, she pulled out a much bigger vibrator from under her bed.

She said she’d try to do it again and let me use it on her and she orgasmed very quickly.

Now she doesn’t seem to want sex with me but pulls out the toy when she’s feeling horny. There’s no way I can compete with that.

DEIDRE SAYS: Let her know you are feeling sidelined and miss the intimacy you had before.

Ask that she limits using her vibrator to when you’re not around, or offer to build her sex toys into your sexual repertoire. Many couples do.

Good sex is more about knowledge than size. When you do have sex, talk to her about what she enjoys and what pressure and speed to use when touching those erogenous zones.

My support pack called Understanding Female Pleasure will ensure that you’ll never be replaced by a sex toy.

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Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team

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Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page or email us at:

deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk

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