DEAR DEIDRE: AFTER breaking up with my girlfriend, I am worried for her as I know she isn’t coping.
I am 21 and she is 20.
We had been together for almost two years, but I felt that our relationship was running out of steam.
It wasn’t an easy decision to break up but I know it was the right one.
Yet I have spoken to her a couple of times since we split – and sometimes she sends me texts saying she is thinking of taking her own life, and I am scared she may do something to harm herself.
A friend of mine killed them-self and it really affected me.
I suggested that my ex gets help but she says she can’t tell anyone else.
I am not the best person to help her with this because the reason she feels like this is because I broke up with her.
If I stop communicating with her completely, I think it might help her get over me more quickly.
DEIDRE SAYS: Don’t suddenly stop contacting her. It could make her feel worse.
However, that doesn’t mean that you are responsible for her mental state or that you should cope with this worry alone.
Ultimately, you are not responsible for her actions, and what she decides to do is outside of your control.
Don’t give in to her manipulation, but suggest she contacts Papyrus Hopeline, which helps young people.
Please get support there, too (papyrus-uk.org, or call 0800 068 41 41).
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