NYC mom marks first Christmas since losing son in shooting

NEW YORK (PIX11) -- Soleah Rayne said the holidays will never be the same without the joy of her 18-year-old son Temi Lawal.

"Around the holidays we don't have the life that we used to have," Rayne said. "We wish he was here with us to keep us uplifted."

Normally, the family celebrated the holidays with traditions, including opening up gifts, watching movies, talking, and playing games. Now those traditions are gone. 

Rayne’s son was shot and killed while with family and friends in Mississippi. His mother remembers getting the call the day after Mother’s Day. She had plans on moving her son home to the Bronx. 

"If I could have made some moves to get him here faster," Rayne said. "I wanted to know why he had to leave at this point. I was in shock."

She shares that feeling of loss with dozens of other mothers with the same pain of losing a child. Many of them got together to hold each other this holiday season, sharing food, games and a little cheer.

For 10 years, the not-for-profit organization Not Another Child, Inc. has been creating an outlet for families to talk about their grief and the new norm. Its message is that when the holidays aren’t happy, there’s always hope.

What keeps Rayne strong is holding onto her son’s memories. The two shared poetry together. Her hope for other families this holiday season is to hold onto their own memories.

"Knowing that his energy is present keeps me going.” Rayne said.