This column first ran in Valerie Monroe’s newsletter, How Not to F*ck Up Your Face, which you can subscribe to on Substack.
Q: Love your column! I am fair and fully experiencing the thinning of skin on my face (60 next year). Drooping is more of an issue than wrinkling, but wrinkling is catching up. I have used vitamin C for years, RoC cream on my eyes, and added a drugstore moisturizer with retinol a year ago. To me, my skin always looks the same, but I do the things anyway. Recently, I asked my dermatologist for a prescription retinoid since you and others I trust swear by it. And I don’t get it: I don’t see any change. Am I doing it wrong? What should I be looking for? I’m happy to keep marching forward on faith, but I’m confused about why I can’t see a difference when others seem to know when something is working or not.
A: A few curious HNTFUYF-ers recently wrote me about the same thing: How long does it take to see a difference in their skin when using a prescription retinoid?
It’s a difficult question to answer, because results can vary. And how do we know whether any difference we’re seeing is due solely to the retinoid and not some other variable, like a month of good sleep, or a little weight gain or loss, or nutritious meals, or … love? (More on variables, below.) What I can tell you is that prescription retinoids have been studied for many years, and the results of those studies show a decrease in fine lines, wrinkles, and an assist with the generation of collagen and elastin. So, while four months of use isn’t likely to result in a big (or visible) change in your complexion, consistent use over time (along with consistent use of sunscreen) should help repair extant damage and prevent more.
Most experts say it takes at least four to six months of consistent use for a product to begin to affect the skin visibly. Note that at nearly 60, though the quality of your skin should become clearer, no topical will reduce drooping or sagging; that ship has probably sailed. Still, I say keep marching forward. It’s a long game.
And products that claim to make an instantaneous difference in your complexion? They don’t; what you see is cosmetic, usually due to something like mica or another ingredient that sits on the skin and makes it appear brighter or dewier. There’s nothing wrong with that! But it washes off.
Your question raises an interesting point related to self-perception. I recently wrote about making the transition to full grammie-hood when I come to Japan. As I’ve said, I’m often the oldest person in the room, which affects my identity in a challenging way, even though I’m very happy to be in the role of grammie (and mom). But there’s a simpler reason I feel I’ve aged when I’m here: The lighting sucks in my apartment bathroom.
It’s a down light (in the ceiling) that casts shadows on my face and emphasizes all of the manifestations of age I can ignore in my New York apartment, which has flattering bathroom lighting. The unhappy effect of lousy lighting is not to be underestimated. I sometimes glimpse into a Tokyo store mirror and hardly recognize myself, but in the best way — exactly the opposite of what happens to many of us when we unexpectedly catch our reflection in a window.
My point is that in addition to the variables I mention above about self-perception, there are other external variables that can affect the way we see our face — shadowing among them, but also expressiveness (including whether we’re smiling or not) and even which side of our face we’re looking at.
Bottom line: Be patient. Don’t expect miracles. And try to look at yourself always in the best light.
Originally published on November 26.
