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How to face your fears and conquer them in 9 simple steps – with the help of This Morning therapists

WE have watched with bated breath as the I’m A Celebrity campmates faced horrifying challenges again this year.

Radio 1’s Dean McCullough cut short his first Bushtucker Trial because he was terrified at having his legs trapped in sand, while viewers witnessed TikTok star GK Barry’s high-pitched squeals at the sight of critters.

Rex
DJ Dean McCullough had to battle a fear of feeling trapped[/caption]
Rex
Maura Higgins tried to stay strong as she faced her worst nightmare – spiders[/caption]
Rex
GK Barry had to swim through an insect-filled tunnel for the trial[/caption]

Former boxer Barry McGuigan was later strapped to a spinning table covered in cockroaches and mealworms, and Love Island’s Maura Higgins tried to stay strong as she faced her worst nightmare, spiders.

Like the reality show celebs, we all have things that frighten us, but for some people they can take the form of phobias that interfere with our daily lives.

In the UK, an estimated ten million people have phobias, according to NHS figures.

Irrational response

The anxiety disorder — defined as irrational or excessive fears that stop us in our tracks — can impact normal day-to-day life or lead to avoidant behaviour.

TV therapists and phobia experts Nik and Eva Speakman, who regularly appear on ITV’s This Morning, have spent more than 30 years helping thousands of people face their greatest fears and phobias through masterclasses and therapy.

Nik tells Sun on Sunday Health: “A phobia is classed as an anxiety disorder, whereas a fear can actually be helpful and you can live with them.

“You can have a fear of dogs, for example, because you just don’t understand them.

“You can walk past them but fear them.

“With a phobia, your response takes over. You could be saying in your head, ‘I don’t want to feel like this,’ but you just can’t help it. The response becomes irrational.”

Here, Nik and Eva share their coping strategies to help you overcome what frightens you.

1. WHAT’S THE ORIGIN?

TRY to rationalise the origin of your fear or phobia.

Is it actually yours, or have you copied it from a parent, family member or friend?

Knowing the answer to this question then helps you start to appreciate that whatever you are frightened of is not to blame in relation to your fear.

2. IS IT COPIED?

IF your fear is copied, repeat the following to yourself.

“It’s unfair to blame [whatever it is you fear], as it was not to blame. I copied this fear from [whoever it was].”

3. OR IS IT JUST A MISUNDERSTANDING?

NO one is born with fears.

If your fear is not copied, ask yourself: How did this misunderstanding occur?

What started your fear of something that has potentially never harmed you?

Most often this is a personal experience from childhood, like watching a scary film or being told a dramatic story.

4. OR FROM CHILDHOOD?

KNOWING that most phobias are created in childhood, and kids often exaggerate, ask yourself what happened and what you believed back then.

Then ask yourself whether what you believed is factual or not, and consider what is the truth.

You can get a friend without the fear to help you with this, if needed, as often we are trapped in the child’s belief mindset.

5. FEARS Vs FACTS

MAKE a “fears versus facts” list. Create two columns.

On the left side, note down all of your fears and the dialogue that you use to justify them (for example, “I don’t like the way spiders look”).

On the right, in the facts column, positively challenge that belief (for example, “I don’t have to find spiders attractive; I don’t find every human attractive either”).

6. FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT

START to use positive affirmations.

Even if you don’t believe it at all right now, using phrases, for example, “spiders in the UK are not harmful nor are they interested in me”, actually starts to lay down a positive neural pathway, which then gets stronger the more times you say it.

TOP 10

  1. Heights
  2. Spiders
  3. Public speaking
  4. Snakes
  5. Enclosed spaces
  6. The dentist
  7. Flying
  8. Needles
  9. 9. Clowns
  10. Dogs

(Source: Yougov)

7. THE SIGHING METHOD

IMAGINE the thing that you fear (it may help to start with a cartoon image) and then let out a sigh.

Repeat this as often as possible.

This not only acts as a rehearsal to gain confidence, but the sighing helps release alpha waves (similar to when practising mindfulness and meditation) to associate your fear with calm.

8. NAIL IT

CONSIDER your achievements and any moments where you have shown strength.

Really immerse yourself in those great feelings while firmly applying pressure to either side of your thumb nail, using your thumb and index finger from your opposite hand to pinch.

Use this with controlled box breathing (in for four, hold for four, out for four, hold for four and repeat).

This is a great way to start your day, but also a great go-to for comfort if you ever come face-to-face with your fear.

9. DILUTE YOUR FEAR

FINALLY, gradual exposure using the sighing technique or box-breathing trick can actually help to dilute your fear more and more over time.

Start with a cartoon or self-drawn amateur picture and sigh.

Only when you feel comfortable with that, move on to the next level, such as a black and white photo, then colour, then a black and white film, then a colour film, then the real thing from a distance and so on.

  • For details about The Speakmans’ Fears & Phobias masterclasses in 2025, visit mentalhealth.events

Physical symptoms

PHOBIAS can be caused by many things, including animals, objects, places and situations.

As well as overwhelming feelings of anxiety, panic attacks that occur suddenly and without warning are common among people with phobias, according to the NHS.

Other physical symptoms include: sweating, trembling, hot flushes or chills, shortness of breath, a choking sensation, rapid heartbeat, chest pain or tightness, a sensation of butterflies in the stomach, nausea, headaches, dizziness, numbness or pins and needles, a dry mouth, a need to go to the toilet, ringing in your ears, and feeling confused or disoriented.

In severe cases, you may also experience psychological symptoms, such as:

  • Fear of losing control
  • Fear of fainting
  • Feelings of dread
  • Fear of dying

If you are struggling, be sure to seek help.

Your GP can refer you to a specialist, such as a psychologist.

You can also refer yourself directly to an NHS talking therapies service, or pay for private treatment.

Most phobias can be treated successfully through gradual exposure, counselling, psychotherapy, cognitive behavioural therapy and sometimes medication to manage anxiety.

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