I am sitting in a New York diner at the moment, absolutely killing the atmosphere by writing powerfully with heavy fingers slapping at the plastic keys at, say, 200 words or a minute or something like that. Yes, I type that fast. I might be the fastest? And I can type with my eyes closed. An office party trick if ever there was one. Go on… try it right now. See if you can do it. Now show your colleague your new skill. Can they do it? Of course not. You are better than them and they now know it.
You know what other teams can’t do? Set-pieces quite like Arsenal. We’re being harassed in the media for… being really good at something. Can you believe it’s an angle? I can. Why? Becuase people struggle with change in the world of sport.
Chelsea > big, strong, winners
City > dark arts and pretty
Arsenal > weak, young and cowardly
We’re not any of those things under Mikel Artea. The Spaniard played at Arsenal in the days of players planning which away games they’d take off. He was part of a midfield that was overrun every week. He’d line up in massive Champions League games and know that Wenger had not done the requisite work to win. Players couldn’t beat the front post with corners, which didn’t matter, because there wasn’t a plan once the ball was in the box. Arsenal lacked power, we lacked height, and we lost away game after away game.
Arteta internalised all of those things and decided as a manager he’d be the opposite. He’s peak Moyesy when it comes to maximising resources and he’s Pep Guardiola when it comes to the beautiful game at the highest level. Everything you see on the pitch right now is a reaction to his time as a player. He has shifted the sporting narrative, but the easy comms narrative of Arsenal being limp is proving a stubborn stain to remove… so instead of embracing our newfound skillz, people want to fight for reasons it’s not real.
Arteta wants to create unfair advantages on the pitch. It’s a very basic idea. Find an opportunity, which in this case is setpieces. Hire someone who only cares about setpieces, a total nerd who knows how Barry Town defend inswingers in temperatures below 24 degrees. Give them the keys to the castle. Add compound V to the idea (beastly players / guided missile crossers) and persist until it clicks.
Arsenal aren’t good at setpieces purely because of the coaching, they’re good at them because they found a collection of players who revel in the chaos they cause every week. They have found a way to mentally torture good keepers, baffle elite coaches, break teams from anywhere. No one has cracked the code of big lumps, steaming in from the blind spot, attacking low punched crosses.
It. Is. Amazing.
Berbatov calling us Stoke? Love it. The only thing you have to be aware of is a lot of the media pressure being *stoked* here isn’t about being mean. It’s about alerting a pliant PGMOL to the idea that this new skillset we have might actually be cheating. They want refs to clamp down and say that Timber blocking runs should be banned. That people should be red-carded for testing. That somehow, this is another example of Arteta breaching rules. Dark arts and clever football is not acceptable if it’s coming from Arsenal. Lauded when it’s Mourinho or Conte, despised as too foreign when it’s Mikel and multicultural Arsenal.
Here’s the thing: If this were Slot or Gaurdiola doing this, we’d be speaking of the genius. If Arsenal were conceding from set-plays, we’d be reading the thought pieces about ‘naive’ young players and a green manager who doesn’t get what it takes to be a Premier League manager. Similar to when he was being mocked for playing out the back.
But, the most boring part of it all is I have to spend time defending Arsenal against braindead commentary from people who have nothing interesting to say… vs giving you 2000 words lauding the best team in the league.
I just don’t understand how exfootballers who know how hard it is to be at the level Arsenal are can’t be excited for the players? Why do we seem to read more positive press about Spurs after a 3 game winning streak than Arsenal? It’s very dull.
Talking of Spurs, remember when I told you that Big Ange was heading into trouble? Then people thought Spurs had cracked it because they spanked City? Now they’re 10th in the league after losing to Bournemouth (no shame, really) and Ange is getting booed by the away fans and going in for confrontation? The magic ain’t there boys and girls. Ange is like Unai Emery, he has one way of playing, it’s wide and open, and when his side is on the right side of a variance, they’re spectacular… problem is, you can’t rely on variance in this league. You need to have a game that is capable of good attack that is not at the expense of defending. Unai, on the right side of the variance, made top 4 considering over 60 goals last season. This year, he’s on the wrong side, and they’ve been dreadful.
You have to judge a manager by the body of their work - Unai has a pattern to his game, he gets the most out of players for a bit, but he can’t setup a defence, and that eventually costs him. So does Ange. It’ll end in tears for both in the end, even if there are some nice pops in between. The difference between managers who squeeze into the top 4 and managers who can compete for the title is quite vast in my opinion.
Just some little pieces of news… Albert looks like he’s going to stay at Arsenal with Mikel. He’s part of the main cast of characters who have rebuilt this squad with great coaching. I’m glad he’s sticking around. I’m not sure why anyone would want to go elsewhere when we’re so close to completing chapter one of the Arsenal rebirth.
Gabi and Calafiori were on the pitch after the game, suspect they won’t be ready for the weekend’s game against City, probably more likely we see them for the Everton game. But hey, if we play like we just did, we’ll not need them, and two of our better players will get a bit of rest in December.
How are things going for City? There’s a video of Pep G reacting to a fan on the street with a phone. My thoughts? You don’t want to see that as a fan. Calmness is a better reaction. I can’t stand dickheads pointing phones at famous people for clicks, but it happens, and part of the reason you’re paid so much is that you don’t react. But, we’re all human, and sports folk are quite aggressive by nature. Still… good that he seems to struggling with the weight of City’s many, many issues.
Ok, final part of the post. Thanks to all the folk who have signed up to Le Grove for the year or have free trials running. I’m writing a lot, we’re creating a lot of podcast content, hopefully you enjoy being part of the community! Offers are below with an exclusive Before the Whistle dropping a little bit later today.
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