DEAR DEIDRE: MY cousin wants us to move back to my home town but my husband won’t hear of it.
I met my husband online. We got married six years ago and then I moved closer to my husband’s family 50 miles away but I don’t like the area.
Plus my husband has mental health problems and when he’s feeling down, which is quite often, I spend a lot of time on my own. I’m a woman of 34 and he’s 38.
Recently my cousin died because of a sudden bleed on the brain. She was only 34 and was a single mum.
My other cousin, her sister, now has four children to bring up.
When we went to the funeral, my cousin asked if I’d consider going back home and I said I couldn’t, but it got me thinking.
She needs some help and our children are of a similar age to both my cousins’ children.
I broached the idea with my husband but it was an absolute no from him. Now I feel really unhappy.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Ask him whether you can write down together all the pros and cons of living in either place.
Perhaps a change of scene would do him good and give him a new outlook. If commuting to work is an issue, he may consider a compromise somewhere in between your families.
Look at properties and schools in both places to see what’s affordable, which may help him change his mind.
My support pack called Standing Up For Yourself shows how you can validate your reasons for moving.
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