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This time of year is special for a lot of reasons. From faith and family to the memories of that first bike and grandma’s sweet potato pie, this time of year always seems to bring us together in the spirit of brotherhood and joy.
Of course, all of us know the stress and hardship that comes with the holiday season.
From struggling to put presents under the tree when the budget is already tight to post-election anxiety painting a dire picture of the year to come, we all know how difficult it can be, especially when the absence of a family loss colors every celebration. But, for some of us, it’s worse than difficult.
This time of year can be a real struggle. We know we should be happy, but with every “Fa La La,” we feel more isolated and the shame of that disparity can drive us even further into darkness. We know it’s happening. We feel it deep in our bones. But we don’t talk about it.
That’s a problem.
The truth is that while suicide rates have declined overall in America, it’s increased in the Black community, with suicide among Black Americans rising 19% between 2018 and 2021 while, over that same period, it spiked 50% among Black youth.
The truth is that suicide is the third leading cause of death for Black folks, male and female, aged 10-24. Only accidental death and homicide were higher. In fact, according to the Suicide Prevention Resource Center, more than one in every five (22%) Black high school student seriously considered suicide in 2021, with roughly 18% making a plan to do it.
In other words, if you have a son or daughter in high school, regardless of how happy they may seem, there’s a decent chance that either they have seriously considered suicide or that they’re thinking about it right now.
Still, whether it’s because of the economic realities of poverty and the lack of health insurance or the cultural stigma mental health still faces in our community and across our nation, only one in three Black Americans struggling with mental illness receive treatment. That’s not only dangerous. It’s deadly.
On top of that, research shows us that those of us who do seek help are often misunderstood, misdiagnosed or outright dismissed by doctors whose bias, whether conscious or unconscious, doesn’t recognize a person in real pain if they happen to be Black.
Now, let’s be clear: my faith has always served as a source of inspiration and strength in my life, reminding me that it’s never more than I can bear, and it’s always darkest before the dawn. But I also know that pretending our Sunday services can cure anything that ails us is misguided at best.
If the deacon broke his leg, does he wear a cast? Does the choir director go to the doctor when she has the flu? The same thing applies when it comes to mental health. I know a lot of pastors and folks and they all say the same thing: Going to a psychiatrist doesn’t mean you don’t love Jesus.
But, after all that, the most important thing I want you to understand is that no matter how hopeless it can feel, no matter how much you want to hide that desperation, no matter how impossible it all seems or how the shame is always there when you just can’t get it together. You’re not alone.
You don’t have to be afraid. You don’t have to be ashamed. Don’t wait until you’re in crisis, and if you’re in crisis, don‘t wait at all. There is help and there is hope. You are not alone.
The holidays should be a time of family, peace and joy, but for too many of us, it’s the worst time of the year. We can’t be silent about this crisis in our families and our community or any community, regardless of its color or creed. We cannot allow a silent night to be a silent struggle.
I hope everyone gets a chance to relish in the holiday season this year, and if you need help, I hope you don’t hesitate to call.
The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals. Find more information about the Lifeline at suicidepreventionlifeline.org. Press the button on the website to call directly, or simply dial 988.
Antjuan Seawright is a Democratic political strategist, founder and CEO of Blueprint Strategy LLC and a senior visiting fellow at Third Way. Follow him on X, formerly known as Twitter @antjuansea.
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Black People And Seasonal Depression: How To Combat Seasonal Affective Disorder
