Even though I enjoy sex with my girlfriend, I still get the urge to masturbate

DEAR DEIDRE: EVEN though I have loads of sex with my girlfriend, I still get the urge to masturbate.

My girlfriend thinks it means I’m not satisfied with her, but that’s not true. She says it’s not normal.

We’re both 18 and have been together for a year.

We have sex every night we’re together, sometimes more than once. But I still like to pleasure myself too.

Once, I went to the bathroom to do it and she caught me. She was really upset, saying I shouldn’t need to.

I’m worried I’m abnormal and that I’m doing it too much, and might hurt myself.

Is there something wrong with me?

DEIDRE SAYS: It’s perfectly normal and healthy to masturbate, even when you’re in a relationship and having lots of sex.

Masturbating doesn’t just relieve sexual tension, it also helps with stress and keeps your reproductive system healthy. It won’t do you any harm.

Young men are particularly likely to need to masturbate frequently. 

It may be that you have a higher sex drive than your girlfriend.

Reassure her and try not to worry. 

See my support pack on Masturbation.