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For years, my 8-year-old son has said he wants to be a master builder for The Lego Group. So many of our bedtime stories were about Legoland, and I wanted to take him there as badly as he wanted to visit. It reminded me of visiting SeaWorld as a teenager and being inspired to study marine biology.
However, as a single mom, finances can be tight, and I knew it would take some strategic planning and scrimping to make the trip happen. Although some parents are willing to go into debt for their dream vacations, I'm not. I've always valued experiences over material things, but not if it breaks the bank.
In the weeks leading up to our trip, I asked my son to help create our itinerary with one activity per day. The highlight of the weeklong vacation would be Legoland, and we put together a list of attractions in the San Diego area that ranged from free options like the beach or low-cost museum visits to the pricier attractions.
As I worked on the big-picture budget, I also helped my son create his own. He had been really excited to hear a friend describe how his savings account grew money over time. So when we sold his bike for $80 early in the summer, I set the money aside in my high-yield savings account for his spending money.
As for the trip itself, there were a few things I could take advantage of. I was able to cash in a couple of bonds that my grandfather purchased for me decades ago, I had air miles I could use for the short trip from Oregon to California, and we had access to a family timeshare. Had we not had some help with these expenses, I likely would have shortened the trip or continued saving for another year.
I focused on finding deals for the rental car, food, and attractions and saved in those areas by visiting mid-week and buying tickets that included meals.
My one splurge was an overnight stay at the Legoland hotel, which was completely worth it when I saw my son's smile as we walked into our Ninjago-themed room and played with the Lego bricks in the pool.
We landed in San Diego early Monday afternoon, dropped off our bags, and headed to Trader Joe's to grab snacks and breakfast fixings for the week. My son was amazed by everything he saw — the palm trees, the playground we spotted across the street, and our big studio room. I thought back to the many trips I'd taken over the years while enjoying seeing the city through his eyes.
My son had a nice sum to spend during the week. He'd been saving his allowance, and I matched the proceeds from the sale of his bike. He had earned a meager amount of interest in the savings account, and we talked about how, had the money stayed in the account longer, he would have earned more.
He wanted a $150 Lego set at Legoland, so he knew he had limited funds to spend elsewhere. At the start of each day, we discussed how much he had to spend, and then he carefully made a decision at each attraction. Despite this, there were some additional requests for me to buy things, and although I stayed firm on most, I did give in to some, like Ninjago pajamas, which he needed anyway. He loved wearing them around the park the next day.
Every place we went had souvenir penny machines. I've collected these since I was a kid and was excited when Noah asked to get them, happily contributing the 50 cents or a dollar it took for the little memento. I stood behind him and thought about which imprint I'd choose as he carefully picked his own, like the Komodo dragon at the San Diego Zoo or the dolphins at SeaWorld.
As our energy decreased in the waning days of our trip, we slowed down. At first, I'd really wanted to maximize our time and take in all that we could, hoping to "get our money's worth," but by Friday, we needed a break. A late start wouldn't hurt our visit to SeaWorld, which was open until 8 p.m.
We hung out in our studio, eating breakfast and lunch there before heading out. It was a nice reminder that vacation doesn't always have to be about seeing and doing everything; it can also be about relaxing.
We spent our last day with friends, enjoying a hike overlooking La Jolla and eventually moving closer to the beach to watch the waves and sea lions. Our activity that day was another beautiful reminder that nature is free and entertaining in its own right.
In the days following the trip, I felt exhausted by the daily money decisions yet relieved and satisfied that I navigated them. Creating meaningful moments doesn't require going into debt; instead, it can be about intention and focus on what's important.
My son will never know how much I spent on that trip. What he'll remember is seeing the panda at the San Diego Zoo and driving the cars at Legoland. And that's exactly what I want him to remember.
Deborah Goldstein is a philanthropy advisor focused on supporting philanthropists on their giving journey. In her spare time she's working on a memoir about the meaningful moments of life.
