Tonight is the 2024 MTV VMAs night! It's wild that they scheduled it both on September 11 and the day after the presidential debate, but here we are! Back on the black carpet!
Have there been better MTV VMA red carpets with more exciting and daring looks? Definitely, yes. Anyway...
Tonight's show is hosted by Megan Thee Stallion, the announcement of which is maybe one of the first times I've ever been excited to watch the VMAs. Taylor Swift leads with the most nominations (10), and will maybe, hopefully, use the evening to announce reputation (Taylor's Version) (you never know!); Sabrina Carpenter, Chappell Roan, GloRilla, and Halsey are set to perform; Katy Perry (ugh) is receiving the Video Vanguard Award and will probably use the speech to say some more dumb shit; and Roan has already told at least one person to shut the fuck up.
It has the potential to be a fun night! But first, let's judge everyone's looks.
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Short n' sweet? More like simple n' fine!
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I literally gasp every time I see a photo of this woman.
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I feel like this dress is screaming that it's capable of being so much more and that it dreams of some day adorning feathers, rhinestones, a giant tutu, or some kind of mechanism that makes it look like it's actually on fire. Three stars for color, though.
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This assemble is a choice. But it's a choice that only Snooki could make.
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It looks like this dress went to military school in order to be draped like this: Zero wrinkles, zero snags, a perfect crease wherever the crease is meant to be. I am stunned and impressed.
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I love a slip that tells a story...even when I don't know what that story is.
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THIS is the type of VMA look I love! Ill-fitting and kind of insane.
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This is like a hot Scottish bondage dominatrix, which is a look we don't see enough of, IMO.
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If I won an Olympic medal in anything, I would wear it everywhere, especially to a red carpet, so, unfortunately, I cannot relate to this look.
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I've been hating on Katy Perry a lot lately and...there's still no end in sight. What is this? If she thinks she's making some sort of feminist statement about rising from the torn rags of her reputation, then let me be the first to tell her, this isn't it!
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Girls just want to have spliced, two-toned suits. I get it.
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This looks like the baby or PG version of Megan Thee Stallion's dress. Or like, if you ordered Megan Thee Stallion's dress from some sketchy website with an ad on Facebook, and this is what was ultimately delivered.
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It took me a few minutes to realize this is a bejeweled blazer lapel and a bra, and not a bikini top from JCPenny.
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I believe the dress could use one less row of lacing, but, other than that, hot nun-meets-sexy bed bride-meets-slutty milkmaid is always a winning combination, in my opinion.