Sabrina Carpenter Kissed an Alien, and I Liked It
Sorry, Barry Keoghan, but Sabrina Carpenter is into extraterrestrials now. True to her word, the 25-year-old singer was working late Wednesday night at the 2024 MTV VMAs because she’s a singer, but also because she had an alien threesome to attend. Making her VMAs main-stage debut, the “Espresso” singer performed a medley of hits off Short n’ Sweet. While Carpenter’s vocals sounded sharp, a sexy alien in a dress may have stolen the show right out from under her.
Sabrina Carpenter besándose con un alien durante su actuación en los #VMAs pic.twitter.com/fVlsOSygkN
— Sabrina Carpenter Spain (@SabrinaCarp_SP) September 12, 2024
Said sexy alien performed choreography in sync with Carpenter, humped a moon-man, and then let an astronaut simulate cunnilingus on her. Then, ending things with a bang, Carpenter made out with the lady alien, prompting more tweets than I can count referencing “the illegal alien in prison with transgender operation” from last night’s presidential debate. While I was expecting some sort of Camila Cabello and Shawn Mendes love-triangle showdown, this outer-space trio was one I did not see coming. And honestly? This was far more gratifying.
Anyways, congratulations to the music industry’s favorite Irishman-loving short girl. If that kiss painted on Carpenter’s thigh during her performance indicates anything at all, I’m sure she’s about to have a really good night — as she should.
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