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Back to school: 5 ways to intentionally support your child’s well-being

As the back-to-school season rolls around, it’s easy for parents to become engrossed in the logistics of preparing their children for the new academic year.

The to-do lists are long, and the days are often packed with shopping for supplies, organizing schedules and planning extracurricular activities.

However, amid all this busyness, there’s a crucial aspect that often gets overlooked: your child’s mental and emotional well-being. In today’s high-pressure world, it’s more important than ever to be intentional about how you support your child.

Here are five key ways to ensure you’re tuned into your child’s needs and helping them thrive.

Create a balanced routine

One of the most important ways to support your child’s well-being is by establishing a balanced routine. While it’s natural to focus on academics and extracurricular activities, it’s essential to ensure that your child’s day includes time for relaxation and personal growth. A balanced routine helps your child manage stress, avoid burnout, and maintain a sense of stability.

Start by setting up a schedule that includes dedicated time for homework, physical activity, and leisure. Make sure there’s time each day for your child to unwind — whether through reading, playing outside, or engaging in creative activities. This downtime isn’t just about relaxation; it’s a crucial period for your child to process their day, engage in imaginative play, and rejuvenate.

Moreover, being intentional about routine means checking in regularly to see if it’s working. Are they feeling overwhelmed? Do they have enough time to relax and just be kids? Adjust as needed to ensure the routine supports their overall well-being.

Have purposeful conversations

Communication is the cornerstone of a strong parent-child relationship, and it’s particularly important when it comes to understanding your child’s mental and emotional state. Instead of waiting for your child to come to you with problems, make daily check-ins a deliberate practice. Ask open-ended questions that encourage your child to share their thoughts and feelings about their day.

For example, instead of asking, “How was school?” which might elicit a simple “fine,” try asking, “What was the best part of your day?” or “Did anything happen today that made you feel worried or excited?” These types of questions invite your child to reflect on their experiences and share more openly.

Purposeful conversations not only keep you informed but also strengthen your bond with your child. They build trust, making it easier for your child to approach you when something is wrong. By being an active listener and showing genuine interest in their experiences, you help create a safe space where your child feels comfortable discussing their worries, successes, and everything in between.

Observe subtle signs of distress

Being intentional also means being observant. Children often express their stress, anxiety, or unhappiness through subtle signs that can be easy to miss if you’re not paying attention. It’s crucial to be vigilant and recognize these signs early on.

Pay close attention to any changes in your child’s behavior, mood, or habits. For instance, are they more irritable or withdrawn than usual? Have their sleeping or eating patterns changed? These shifts, though sometimes minor, can be indicators of underlying stress or anxiety that may need addressing.

Academics and social interactions can also provide clues. A sudden drop in grades, reluctance to go to school, or withdrawal from friends and activities can signal that something is wrong. Physical complaints like headaches, stomachaches, or frequent illnesses might also be manifestations of emotional distress. If you notice any of these signs, it’s important to take them seriously and address them promptly.

Start by gently asking your child about what might be bothering them. Let them know that it’s okay to feel upset or anxious and that you’re there to help them work through their feelings.

Support their unique journey

Every child is unique, with their own strengths, challenges, and pace of development. As parents, we often have expectations based on our own experiences or societal norms, but it’s crucial to meet your child where they are, not where you think they should be.

Intentional parenting involves recognizing and celebrating your child’s individuality. Whether they excel in academics, sports, the arts, or something else entirely, it’s important to support their interests and passions. This may mean letting go of preconceived notions about what success looks like and, instead, focusing on what brings your child joy and fulfillment.

For example, if your child shows a strong interest in art but struggles with math, it’s key to acknowledge and nurture their artistic talents while supporting them in areas where they may need more help. Encourage them to pursue their passions and create an environment where they feel valued and understood.

Supporting your child’s unique journey also means being patient and allowing them to develop at their own pace. Not every child will hit milestones at the same time, and that’s okay. Celebrate their progress, however small, and offer encouragement along the way.

When to seek professional help

Despite your best efforts, there may come a time when your child needs more support than you can provide on your own. Knowing when to seek professional help is a critical aspect of intentional parenting.

If you notice persistent signs of distress—such as ongoing anxiety, depression, or behavioral changes—it’s important to seek help from a pediatrician, therapist, or counselor. Early intervention can make a significant difference in your child’s well-being and help prevent more serious issues down the line.

Normalize conversations about mental health within your family. Make it clear that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. This not only helps your child but also contributes to reducing the stigma around mental health issues in the broader community. By creating an open and accepting environment, you encourage your child to be honest about their feelings and seek help when needed.

As the new school year begins, it’s essential to approach your child’s well-being with intentionality. By focusing on creating a balanced routine, having purposeful conversations, observing subtle signs of distress, supporting your child’s unique journey, and knowing when to seek professional help, you can ensure that your child is not just surviving the school year but thriving. Your deliberate actions and attention can make all the difference in helping your child navigate the challenges of today’s world with resilience, confidence, and happiness.

Patti Cotton serves as a thought partner to CEOs and their teams to help manage complexity and change. Reach her vial email at Patti@PattiCotton.com.

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