How do I let my female friend down gently?
DEAR DEIDRE: HOW do I let my female friend down gently?
I know she really likes me, and I really value her friendship but I don’t fancy her in the slightest.
I’m 23, she’s 21, and we’ve been friends for three years.
We first met when we both worked as sales associates in a shoe shop.
Spending so much time together meant that we quickly became close and have stayed in touch.
Since the beginning, I’ve always had a suspicion that she has had a crush on me, but recently things have escalated.
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Every time we meet up, she constantly finds excuses to touch me and is never shy about complimenting me on the way I look. Even our mutual friends have made comments about it.
I’ve tried my hardest to ignore it, but over time it’s become impossible. Just last week on a friend’s birthday night out, she got drunk and tried to kiss me.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Mismatched feelings between friends can be complicated.
Letting her down without changing the dynamic or hurting her feelings will be difficult, but the most important thing is that you’re honest.
Find a quiet moment to talk to her and tell her how you feel. Explain that while you really care about her as a friend, unfortunately your feelings aren’t any deeper.
Make sure to assure her that you still want her in your life, but some boundaries need to be in place.
If your friendship is meant to last, she’ll respect your decision and honesty.