After graduating college their support stopped. It made me more budget-conscious. I also appreciated more when they filled up my gas tank as a gift.
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Growing up, I always had what I needed. I didn't have everything that I wanted, but my parents worked hard to make sure my siblings and I were well taken care of.
My parents also generously supported me through college. I had a sizable scholarship, but their help was a massive privilege that I don't take lightly, especially when I see friends still paying off student loans late in their 30s.
Right before Christmas, my senior year, though, they told me the day I graduated, their financial support would end. I'm so glad they did this.
Knowing the gravy train was ending kicked me into overdrive, finding a job where I could support myself. I went to every job fair and sent out what felt like a million resumes while I watched other students coast during the last semester of school.
I think it's common for new college graduates to want to wait for their dream job or something they're passionate about to come along. That's not realistic and, in my experience, typically means their parents still have to support them.
My dream job was to work for a popular Southern lifestyle magazine, but the job would have started as a six-month unpaid internship. Had my parents supported me through this, I wouldn't have become self-sufficient as quickly, and it wouldn't have set a great boundary. Once you ask for help, it's easier to ask again.
It was a tough pill to swallow, knowing that I'd have to put my dream aside as I declined the interview and instead found myself with a cold-calling sales position. It was as awful as it sounds, but I was able to support myself from day one on the job.
I had always been conscious with my babysitting and summer job money and considered myself a saver, but there's a difference when you know there's no safety net if you don't spend your money wisely. My parents had said they would give me an interest free loan should I need one, but also made it clear that they wouldn't be giving a loan for non-essential items and that it would need to be promptly repaid.
I didn't want to have to ask for a loan or go into debt and instead turned to developing a strict budget the first few years out of college. It meant trade offs like waiting 20 minutes on the weekends for the metro vs paying for a taxi and shopping from consignment stores.
I also started reading financial blogs for tips and strategies, and I strongly believe those first few years set the tone for how I've continued to manage my money. You have to live within your means, which means you can't always have everything you want.
Being on my own made me appreciate what my parents had done for me even more. I didn't fully understand the sheer amount of work it takes to make $44,000 (my first salary out of school) or the sacrifices and tradeoffs that are dictated by how much you make. It put into perspective just how much my parents did for me and made me more grateful.
Little unexpected surprises like my parents filling up my gas tank became more meaningful. A sudden extra $35 in my bank account felt huge, and I know I wouldn't have appreciated things like this as much if my parents had been supporting me with rent or spending money.
Even though it meant lots of trade-offs for what I wanted to do after college, I'm glad my parents made it clear that they wouldn't financially support me after I graduated.
