Courtesy of Averee Nelson
Over the past month, I've been dealing with moving apartments in New York City — which is a chaotic endeavor, to say the least. I knew that even switching my address for my WiFi would take multiple calls. But I was shocked when I was met with judgment for still being on my dad's phone plan.
Each time I spoke with a sales associate, they advertised adding their mobile services to my plan, which I declined on multiple occasions. Each sales associate jokingly asked if I was on my family's phone plan, and I sheepishly admitted I was. I thought we'd continue the conversation about my internet plan, but I was met with a chuckle and a comment about how I'd save money switching to their plan.
On one hand, I didn't care how they felt; they just wanted to sell me an added service. But on the other, I wondered why getting a little financial assistance from my family should be seen as a bad thing.
I graduated from Columbia Journalism School just over a year ago with my master's, and since then, I've been working five different freelance jobs in writing, editing, and publishing — all while trying to find a full-time position. It's felt like an uphill battle just breaking into the journalism industry, and even with a busy schedule balancing various jobs, I'm still not meeting my present or long-term financial goals.
My parents understand how difficult it's been for me to pursue my career while also living in one of the most expensive cities in the US — not to mention living with student loan debt looming over my head. So, they're happy to help me by letting me stay on the family phone plan and sharing their streaming services with me.
In today's economy, it's not surprising to me that fewer than half of young adults ages 18 to 24 are completely financially independent from their parents, according to a report from the Pew Research Center.
Many of my friends moved back in with their parents after college to save money, and I've debated doing the same thing. Currently, I can afford my general lifestyle — my rent payment, gym membership, and other basic needs to live my life — but my parents help offset some of my costs. It's not ideal, but it's where I'm at right now, and my family knows that I'm working hard to become financially independent.
Like anything, finances are all about balance and compromise. My boyfriend and I save up to go out to dinner every once in a while or do activities that might be costly. We try to enjoy nice nights in with our friends and take full advantage of the many outdoor spaces around the city. We both have side hustles and work to make ends meet.
I constantly think about our future and financial goals when it comes to buying a house, getting married, or having a child down the line. For my parents, these were all goals that were easily within reach. But buying a family home or paying for the wedding of my dreams seems so far off for me.
I've had many discussions with my boyfriend about forgoing some of these conventional aspirations, but that feels super sad. I want them and don't want to let those dreams go just yet.
Still, the thought of buying a house seems unattainable. We had to jump through many hurdles to rent an apartment in Manhattan. There are crazy income requirements, such as making 40 times the monthly rent — and we did not meet this requirement. Just to be able to apply for an apartment here, we relied on some family members to be our guarantors (and they have to make 80 times the rent).
I'm worried we will never be able to live on our own.
I remind myself that everyone is on their own timeline, and there's no "right" way to live. I'm lucky to live in this city and I don't take that for granted. I'm determined to land my big break here.
I'm grateful that my family is so supportive, and just knowing that makes me work harder to meet my goals. I know that one day, I'll be financially independent, and I'll be able to return the favor.
