DEAR DEIDRE: I THINK my partner has a dark side I know nothing about. I keep catching him looking through my wardrobe.
I am 42 and my partner is 43. We have been together for over three years. When I confront him he just says he is looking for something.
If I visit friends or family without him, I notice that my lingerie and other certain items on my dressing table have moved.
I have tried to discuss this with one of my exes as we are really good friends.
He thinks he might be a pervert and that he is no good for me but I am starting to think he is just saying that to get me to go back to him.
I also recently found a sex toy under my partner’s clothes in a drawer.
I don’t know how to discuss this with him. I am confused as sex with him is really good and I have no complaints.
I am seriously worried he is hiding something from me.
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DEIDRE SAYS: He may be a cross-dresser. It is important to know most cross-dressers are very happy in their heterosexual relationships.
Like many men your partner is in touch with his feminine side and may genuinely like the feel of silky lingerie.
It is not a perversion but if this discovery has come as a bolt from the blue, it is only natural to be worried.
My support pack on Cross-dressing Worries will help you understand your partner’s needs and also explains specialist support.
