Courtesy of the author
Growing up with three siblings, I regularly spent my summers at a beach house with cousins and spring breaks in Arizona, watching the San Francisco Giants' spring training. I always thought I'd do the same when I had my kids and spend our vacations exploring new places as a family.
Now that I have my own three kids, I've found that I don't particularly enjoy family vacations. It's expensive to fly with five people, you always need two hotel rooms, and my husband doesn't enjoy travel. I am the planner, and that role is tough when you are trying to please five different personalities, especially with teenagers in the mix.
A few years ago, I had the opportunity to travel to Florida and bring one of my kids along. While I would normally have declined the opportunity in favor of a full-family trip, I decided to take my oldest kid along. I couldn't believe how easy it was to travel with only one kid: We could visit the hotel's pool when she wanted to and enjoy a tepanyaki restaurant where her brothers would have turned up their noses.
Since then, I've sought out opportunities to travel with my kids individually, and it has become my favorite way to see a new city or country.
My middle kid could spend all day fly fishing on a river in Wyoming without a care in the world. This activity would be particularly hard for my youngest due to his ADHD. He's much happier on a food tour or doing something active like hiking.
When my daughter and I visited Costa Rica on a cruise this past spring, we spent part of our time in Quepos, visiting the many thrift stores in town. If I'd been there with all three of my kids, there's no way we could have spent as much time doing this activity that she loves.
There's nothing worse than planning a big family vacation and having your kids fight with each other and complain the whole time. Small rental cars, hotel rooms where sharing beds is required, and early wake-up times are typical triggers. Somebody always feels they got the short end of the stick, and it's just not fun to referee sibling fights while trying to relax.
Single-kid trips allow me to accommodate teens who need more sleep with later wake-up times, and there's no fighting over who gets to sit in the front seat of the rental car.
My three kids are all teenagers, and they'll likely go to college in the next few years. I especially love traveling with them individually as I get to see their personalities develop.
When my middle kid and I cruised to Alaska two years ago, he was one of only a few kids on the ship. Without others his age to hang out with, we spent many afternoons in the Crow's Nest, where he taught me how to play Catan. I'm not going to say that we shared our deepest and darkest secrets, but I got to know him outside his place in our family, which was invaluable.
While we do occasionally go on whole-family trips and force Dad to accompany us, I prefer these solo-kid adventures and hope they continue. Cross your fingers that I can convince one of them to hike the Camino de Santiago with me in the future.
