HBO’s Maher declares ‘Biden is toast,’ roasts top replacements Newsom and Harris

HBO host Bill Maher on Friday night held a quasi-roast of potential replacements for President Biden on Friday night, focusing his fire on Vice President Harris and Gov. Gavin Newsom, D-Calif., in particular.

During the latest episode of "Real Time with Bill Maher," the host declared that "Biden is toast" and then ran through a list of possible replacements, offering the strengths and weaknesses of each. Both Harris and Newsom received Maher’s harshest dings, with the host exposing reasons why they probably won’t be getting to the White House.

"Harris has never been popular. You can count the number of delegates she won in the  2020 primaries on one hand, as long as that hand has no fingers," Maher quipped.

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Maher started off the bit telling the Democratic Party to "stop f---ing around" and get to replacing Biden already, because "he is not going to be the Democrats’ candidate in 2024." 

"Biden is toast," the comedian stated, and then got into his list of potential Biden replacements, starting with Harris.

Joking about her pro-abortion bona fides, Maher said, "She won’t just protect Plan B, she is plan B." 

Mentioning her appeal as a diverse candidate, the host said, "Harris would be the first woman president, the first Black woman president and first Asian president." However, he immediately discounted those attributes, stating, "But I don’t vote for who will be the first. I vote for who will win."

He followed up by pointing out her unpopularity in elections, and then went on to quip that while vice president, "she’s been quieter than an electric car." Hitting her with one last salvo of mockery, Maher added, "It’s not fair that she’s not popular, she’s intelligent, and accomplished, and in fact, was put in charge of the border and look at how - okay, bad example."

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The HBO host then introduced Newsom as the "only governor, with the possible exception of Kristi Noem, who looks like he could do porn." He also joked about Newsom being so eager to be the man that replaces Biden, that he "gets an alert on his phone every time Biden can’t think of a word."

Maher then hammered Newsom over his state’s homeless problem, quipping, "They’ll attack him on California’s homeless problem, but there’s a response to that: the homeless can live anywhere, but they choose California."

"Nine out of ten machete-wielding meth addicts say they wouldn’t be unhoused anywhere else."

As opposed to his treatment of Harris, Maher gave some genuine praise to Newsom before moving on to the other candidates, stating, "Newsom is the best communicator in the party with a history of standing up to bullies, and his name lends itself to the best slogan since ‘I like Ike’ – ‘I’m Havin’ Gavin.’"

The host then went through other potential replacements, like Gov. Gretchen Whitmer, D-Mich., and U.S. Department of Transportation Secretary Buttigieg, though hardly made a joke at their expense, except for saying the latter is "only ten years old" and "checks the liberals’ gay best friend box."