Live Laugh Late Life Lesbians
In my four-part series this month so far, I’ve written about how baseball, zombies and homophobia are gay. Now in this final Pride-ful week, I’d like to cover what it’s meant to me to come out over the age of 50. Don’t worry, I won’t be “shoving it in your face” much longer, closeted homo/homophobes, and you’ll be back to your regularly scheduled programming of 11 months of your Hallmark-channel “straight pride” white bread comfort zone soon.
Coming out has been a process; the feeling of not being straight enough for a straight world as a mom who raised kids in suburbia, and not having a wardrobe or hairstyle that’s gay enough for the queers. I’ve never even been to a lesbian bar, although I just read an article about them and was curious to discover that of the 19 official ones in the U.S., one is in DC, about an hour from me. I’m still finding my way.
I chose the headline for this article because I noticed around the internet the term seems to be “Late Life Lesbians” and there are communities on TikTok, Instagram, Reddit groups championing the music of Chappell Roan and other places, and every time I’ve tried to spit out the tongue-twister, I end up with some mixed-up version of “Live Laugh Late Life Lesbians” so it’s become a tongue-in-cheek nickname.
In The Gloss article "Switching Sides: The Realities of Late-Onset Lesbianism," author Emily Hourican writes: “Women are already so physically pally and comfortable with one another through female friendships, that moving this forward into a sexual relationship isn’t the kind of leap it would be for men, more a sort of easy slide into the welcoming arms of a best friend.”
There’s a theory that once the biological drive for children is either satisfied or relinquished, some women discover, often to their own surprise, that they prefer their own sex.
Sex itself is another reason—apparently, lesbians have better sex lives. When asked to rate their sexual satisfaction and how often they orgasm, those women who identify as gay consistently hit higher notes than straight women. This isn’t shocking. Simply knowing your way around anatomically, and not being massively selfish, is a huge help when it comes to sex.