SCHOOL playgrounds can be brutal places for both kids and parents and heading there for the first time is often nerve wracking.
Anxieties about fitting in and making friends feels overwhelming and Tracey King says it was even harder for her and her four children because they come the traveller community.
Tracey, 50, from Tunbridge Wells, Kent, claims other mums are negative towards her family because of a long-standing stigma attached to her upbringing.
Speaking exclusively to Fabulous, the mum-of-four, who ended up taking her youngest daughter Scarlett out of school at the age of 11, says she’s been judged since the day she stepped into school as a child.
Coming from a small town, everyone knew Tracey and her family were travellers, and she says she was quickly labelled.
“Especially on the bus, they used to call me a p**ey, because they know what you are and they think that hurts you,” Tracey recalls of her own school days.
“I never used to say anything back. I just used to go and sit down and be quiet.”
But it seems the stigma hasn’t changed since and according to Tracey, her children have faced the same prejudices – with parents even telling their own to stay away from hers.
She explains: “The problem is, because you come from that background, before you even go to the school, people already know what you are so they already judge.
“My children have come home many times and said, oh blah blah’s mum told her not to play with me because of what we are.
“So yeah, but that was just the norm. That ain’t never going to change.
“Gypsy children stand out in a school. Once you’ve got the name of traveller or gypsy you’re put down.”
As Tracey has lived in a house her whole life, she broke traveller tradition and let her kids study in the school setting, apart from daughter Scarlett who is homeschooled due to health reasons.
“We stayed in one area so we kept them in education, often boys go out and learn to make a living while the girls stay home and learn how to clean and look after their brothers and sisters,” she adds.
“I could see a lot of the posher ladies at the school gates, they look at you like like you’re s**t on their shoes.
Tracey also claims the schooling system makes it difficult for the children of travellers to stay in school because of the application process.
Typically, Gypsies is a term used to describe Romani people, who migrated to Europe from India.
Meanwhile, traveller refers to a group of people who usually have either Irish, Scottish or English heritage.
While many English gypsy girls are allowed to drink alcohol and go on holiday with their friends before they get married, many Irish traveller girls are not allowed to do this.
Generally, both gypsies and travellers will share the same morals.
“You have to put it on the form that you’re from the gypsy community, and you can’t say yes because you do get declined and then your kids can’t go to school, so it’s still very much about discrimination,” she explains.
As a young girl Tracey recalls having a good group of friends but bullies made ‘life a living hell’.
She says two boys would force her to sit away from them as they called her derogatory names such as ‘pi**y’.
But decades later she bumped into one of her school bullies who she confronted.
I don’t know if they thought we were dirty or the kids are a bit wild, but our chavvies are a bit wild
Tracey King
“I’m more outspoken today, because I won’t take people’s bul****t,” she adds.
“He recognised me, and I said to him, ‘Do you remember what you used to say to me? You used to say this to me, you used to make me feel really s**t. And you’re the biggest memory of school, because you made me feel so c**p.
“He replied ‘I didn’t mean to, I don’t remember.’
“I thought, he’s clearly a different person today.”
Now, Tracey reveals the stigma around traveller communities seems to be starting to shift elsewhere.
She says that’s partly thanks to TikTok which has seen both traveller and gypsy content shared far and wide as the community give glimpses into their ways of life.
“Now people have seen a different side of me. I am what I am, I can’t change me. But some people, since being on TikTok, have liked us more,” she adds.
“I don’t know if they thought we were dirty or the kids are a bit wild, but our chavvies (children) are a bit wild.
“It’s only ‘cause we spoil them, that’s why they’re like it, we give them everything they want.”
