BEN Thaler knows the real world is very different to the online realm – as he found when he met the man who issued him a death threat!
The referee has the added dimension of the court of social media, which did not hang, draw or quarter when he first took charge of a Championship game 23 years ago, to deal with.
Officials have sessions with psychologists in helping deal with it, as revealed when the match officials opened up their base to the media.
But Thaler, getting ready for his 20th Super League campaign, knows all too well people face-to-face are different than when they are behind a keyboard.
“I met the guy who made a death threat not long afterwards, he was a sponsor of a club too” Thaler recalled of the incident a few years ago. “We were in the same shop.
“I got all these threats, then I looked at him and laughed. I never got an apology, though.
“I didn’t live far from where he had his big company. He was parked next to me and I smiled.
“Then we were in the shop and he was with his wife. He was more embarrassed than me and said nothing.
“When I first refereed, social media didn’t exist. You may have got someone writing to a newspaper complaining or telling a radio station, ‘That referee was rubbish.’
“Now it gets personal. That’s not a sign of rugby league or refereeing, that’s probably a sad sign of where we are culturally.
“Younger lads have been brought up with Twitter and Facebook. I don’t even know what TikTok is!
“I remember one referee who’d look at his phone at half-time to find out what people had been saying about him. Why do that?
“It is hard but the internal pressure we are under is far greater than externally and we’re there to do a job – we’re not there as cannon fodder to be blamed for stuff.
“There are dark times but there’s never been a moment when I thought, ‘I don’t need this.’”
Thaler may have been around the block enough times to know there is a difference between online and reality.
Younger colleague Liam Moore also recognises that as what wife Elizabeth says is far more important.
He said: “If I get home from work and see my name’s trending at number three on social media, you notice it – the noise is sometimes deafening.
“I like to think I’ve got a thick enough skin but it’s the family side that annoys me. The first person I ring after a game is my wife when I’m in the car.
“She’ll give me a better steer of the narrative – and there have been moments where I thought, ‘Do In really need to put myself through this?’”
Rugby league has changed for players over the years. It also has for referees.
Seeing Moore doing intensive pilates and Thaler having a sports massage before gym and running sessions is a far cry from how it was.
And even though there are times stars vent at officials, the relationship has not really changed. Although as Moore admits, if refs bite back, the player has won.
Like any new season, there are new interpretations to consider, 2024 sees the ruck patrolled far more stringently along with heavier punishments for contact with the head or neck.
For Thaler, though, one thing has remained constant.
“The job and the game have evolved massively,” he told SunSport. “We’ve changed nearly every rule.
“There were six referees who were part-time, so it was a hobby. Then it became a profession and 18 years later, I’m the one who’s still here from the original squad.
“When people got injured, they had to sort it themselves – now everything’s here.
“And it’s good to see younger lads coming in. I was on my own when I was in my early 20s, now I’m the granddad of the group.
“I get, ‘You were refereeing before I was born,’ from them but while the game’s changed, it’s still about the players and the product people want to see.”
