If your New Years resolution this year is to improve your mental health, know that it’s definitely possible (and an excellent goal to have!) but you probably won’t have it checked off your list by February. For one thing, big New Years resolutions are always tough. If you’re anything like me, you hit the ground running in January, all energetic and determined, only to lose steam by March, give up by April, and totally forget what the resolution even was by the time December rolls around again.
For something as abstract as mental health, it can be even harder. Psychotherapist Angela Ficken tells SheKnows that big New Year’s goals often fail due to unrealistic expectations, a lack of patience, all-or-nothing thinking (either you succeed or you fail, with no in between), or overcommitment (not having time or energy to dedicate to your goal). It’s easy to see how all of those could apply to making mental health changes, especially because working on your mental health is a lifelong journey. You can definitely improve your mental health within the space of a year, but you won’t “fix” your mental health in that time, and expecting that will only lead to disappointment.
There are ways out of this discouraging cycle that can work on whatever New Years resolutions you’ve set, and we asked four therapists to share them with us so you can truly hit the ground running this year. And if your resolutions revolve around mental health, you clicked on the right article, because we also asked our experts for the best small changes you can make to actually improve your mental health this year.
Set specific, attainable goals: First, “define clear, achievable objectives with actionable steps,” Ficken says. Ask yourself what exactly you want to do and how you’ll measure your progress, psychotherapist Kristin Padera tells SheKnows. For example, if you want to make a resolution about improving mental health, you might choose something like “journal about my mental health for five minutes, three times a week.”
Celebrate small wins: Celebrating the small steps in between the big, long-term milestones is crucial. “Acknowledge and celebrate even the most minor achievements,” Ficken says, because giving yourself positive feedback will help keep you motivated and on track.
Track your progress: “Use journals or apps to monitor your progress,” Ficken says, “and adjust your goals if needed.” This will keep you accountable and make it easier to see your progress. You may also wish to set a time frame, Padera says, like “I want to be journaling three times a week by February,” to help you “celebrate your success or adjust your goals if needed.”
Reach out for support: You may feel shy or private about your goals, but sometimes sharing them can do a world of good. Ficken recommends sharing them with friends or seeking professional guidance from a therapist, if needed. You can talk to them about challenges that come up, emotions you’re experiencing, and the accomplishments you make along the way.
Explore the “why” behind your goal: What’s fueling your desire to achieve this goal, and how does it align with your broader values as a person? “You are more likely to achieve goals that are tied to your values,” registered social worker Michelle Garroway of The Relationship Agency tells SheKnows, “because they are more meaningful and because you have an anchor point that you can reference each time you start to feel the weight of the work you’re doing.”
Break down your goal into smaller steps: “A goal without a plan is a plan for not achieving your goal,” Garroway says. You might find it helpful to set a broad, long-term goal (“Improve my mental health”), but then break that down into smaller, actionable steps (“find a therapist,” “exercise regularly,” “try meditation“). You might even break those steps down even further (“look up therapists online,” “buy a gym membership,” “find a meditation on YouTube”). As you make the goals smaller and smaller, they start feeling less overwhelming and more like things you can actually schedule into your routine, while connecting back to your big, overall goal. Give yourself bonus points “for making your goals measurable (things like dates or amounts),” Garroway adds.
Try setting a vision instead of a goal: If setting a “goal” still feels like too much, shift your mindset. Instead of setting a goal, licensed social worker Pamela Jackson of Allomothering recommends setting a “vision,” which she describes as “more of a belief about your potential or the quality of life you want to have versus a task you want to complete.” It’s a small but powerful difference. “This can lead to focusing on experiences during your year rather than a checklist as your bottom line,” Jackson tells SheKnows.
Pretty much all of us are trying to improve our mental health, but trying and actually making it happen are two very different things. For mental health especially, allow yourself to embrace tiny, positive changes, like the ones below, all recommended by experts. Over time, these small changes will stack up into a noticeable shift in your mindset and emotions.
Try a daily mindfulness practice. Mindfulness can help you stay in the present moment, which can do a lot for your mental health, including helping you relax, improving your self-esteem, and helping you manage stress, anxiety, and depression, according to the National Institutes of Health. Ficken recommends dedicating ” a few minutes daily to mindfulness exercises or meditation,” which she says can “reduce stress and improve focus.”
Make exercise a regular habit. This may not be the first year you’ve had this goal, but you might not have thought of it in terms of mental health before! Try to get a little bit of exercise every day, even if it’s just a short daily walk, Ficken says. “Exercise is my #1 line of prevention and care when it comes to mental health,” Garroway adds. “The benefits of even getting outside for a 10-minute walk or doing some light stretching in your living room are tremendous. It is an act of self-love and compassion to treat your body to movement, in any way that feels good to you. Your nervous system and your mental health will thank you.”
Eat a little healthier. No, we’re not talking about a total overhaul of your diet or completely cutting out all treats. What you eat absolutely affects your mental health, though, with studies showing that eating more fruits and veggies “positively impacts psychological health” and that daily vegetable consumption can reduce symptoms of depression. So if you’re serious about improving your headspace, look a little closer at what you’re putting in your body. Ficken recommends making small changes to your diet, like “incorporating more fruits, vegetables, and whole grains.”
Chip away at screen time. You might find that the more time you spend on social media or browsing the Internet, the less happy you are. Do your best to measure how much time you spend on a screen every day and try to limit it where you can, even if it’s by just a few minutes every day.
Make sleep a priority. Getting good sleep can massively improve all aspects of your life, including mental health. This year, work to “establish a consistent sleep schedule and create a comfortable sleep environment,” Ficken says. This could include shutting down your screens at least an hour before bed, meditating, and sticking to a strict bedtime and wake-up time.
Connect socially. Building your community can help soothe feelings of loneliness and keep you connected to the people you love. Make sure to reach out to friends or family regularly, even if it’s just a quick call or text, and try setting a numerical goal that feels feasible (like once or twice a week) to make it easier to track.
Try practicing gratitude. This can be as simple as writing down two or three things you’re grateful for every day, or speaking them out loud to yourself every morning. It’s hard at first, but gratitude has been found to help you refocus on what you have instead of what you lack. “Although it may feel contrived at first, this mental state grows stronger with use and practice,” according to Harvard Health.
Set realistic boundaries. Rest is just as important as action when it comes to mental health, so make sure to notice what activities or people drain your energy and take time for yourself when you need. “Learn to say no when necessary to avoid overcommitting and spreading yourself too thin,” Ficken says.
Practice self-kindness. “Have one moment (3-5mins) in the morning that you spend with your hand over your heart saying kind statements to yourself,” Jackson says. And trust us, if you’ve grown up being critical of yourself and constantly looking for ways to improve, this won’t be as easy as it sounds — it might even feel silly at first. The awkwardness and discomfort is all a part of changing your mindset and becoming more compassionate.
Pick up on your thought patterns. “Everything starts with awareness,” Garroway says. You might not realize it, but so much of what we think and do “happens on auto-pilot,” she explains. This year, challenge yourself to pay attention to those automatic thoughts. “Do you like what they’re saying? Are they kind, are they true? Would you speak to a friend in the same way you’re speaking to yourself?” If the answer is no, Garroway says, “rewrite the thought and speak it out loud to yourself from a place of kindness and compassion.”
Align your decisions to your values. You might think of yourself as a person with specific values, but your actions may not always match up with them. Think about what values truly resonate with you (or take a personal values quiz online), and write them down. Then, start thinking about things as “‘choice by choice’ instead of all or nothing,” Garroway says. In other words, “each time you have a choice or opportunity, you can ask yourself ‘is this choice moving me toward my values, or is it moving me away from my values?'” This, she explains, is an “easy and actionable way to cut through the noise and feel good about the decisions you make.”
With all New Years resolutions but especially with ones about mental health, know that it really is all about the journey. “A big audacious goal is great, but it needs to come with an understanding that there are steps to take along the way, with many micro-achievements and setbacks, and the real enjoyment comes from walking the path,” Garroway explains. And whether you’ve been doing this mental health work for years or are just starting on your journey, get comfortable with the fact that this is a lifelong process — and one that’s truly worth the effort.
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