I think I have hit menopause but don’t know if I can have unprotected sex

DEAR DEIDRE: DESPITE the fact my menstrual cycle is usually like clockwork, I haven’t had a period for five months.

Does this mean I’ve hit the menopause?

I’ve noticed some other changes in my body lately as well. I’ve been sweating profusely at night.

When I missed my periods, at first I was terrified that I might be pregnant but I’ve done two tests over the months and they were both negative.

My older friend says these are signs that I’ve hit the menopause but I didn’t think that was possible at my age. I’m only 45 years old.

To be honest, I’d be relieved if I have because I just want to be able to enjoy sex again without the risk of getting pregnant.

I’m the mum of two children. My eldest is 22, has left home and is doing really well for himself.

My other child is nine and, although I adore her, I must admit she has been such a handful that she well and truly put me off having any more children.

My partner and I try to practise safe sex but still we’ve had a few slip-ups.

It’s been difficult to find the right contraception that suits us both.

I think this is why the prospect of the menopause is something I celebrate because it would be nice to enjoy sex again without the hassle of sorting out contraception.

Can I relax now and accept that I’ve hit the menopause or could I still conceive?

DEIDRE SAYS: The menopause is when you haven’t had a period for a whole year.

But it can take a long time before a woman’s periods stop completely.

During this time the woman’s cycle can become very irregular.

This stage is called the perimenopause and while it’s less likely you could get pregnant, there is still a chance you could be fertile.

So it is best to continue to use contraception until you reach the full menopause.

The menopause transition typically begins between ages 40-55.

For more information please read my support pack, Menopause Problems.