DEAR DEIDRE: I MET a lovely woman in a club but I had no idea she was previously a man.
I am 32 and had been out on a leaving do for a colleague.
A group of us ended up in a club around midnight.
I’d had a bit to drink but got chatting and dancing with a very attractive woman. She is 31.
We got on so well and kissed loads. Of course I said yes when she suggested I go back to her place nearby.
When we got there, I was a bit confused when she said she wanted to go straight to sleep without having sex.
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Before she fell asleep, she gave me one last kiss and told me she was a pre-op trans woman.
I was shocked as I have never been attracted to a man and now I wonder if I might be gay.
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DEIDRE SAYS: You’ve had a shock and naturally you are confused about your feelings.
Our sexuality is a complex field and most of us are on a spectrum, not one side of a clear dividing line.
There is nothing wrong with being gay, but she feels like a woman and you fell for her as a woman.
It’s important to be sure you’re comfortable with her having a sex-change before you get more involved and risk one or both of you getting hurt.
You can contact beaumontsociety.org.uk, which is run by and for the transgender communities, and can support you both.
