Cate Blanchett Deserves Better Than Your Bad Movie Etiquette
Last Saturday, I did something that I promised myself I never would. It’s a transgression weighing heavily on my soul, a violation of every moral and social belief I’ve held since I became a freethinker (fresh out of the womb). Hell, some of my peers in the esteemed world of journalism would laugh me out of their circles! And if I am to be stripped of my ranks, so be it. But at my wit’s end, I was faced with no other choice: For the first time in my life, I walked out of a movie.
And not just any movie, either, but my favorite film of the year: TÁR. You know, the one where Cate Blanchett calls herself a “U-Haul lesbian” one second and then addresses how a subset of our society pigeonholes identity to politicize it into a faux personality the next. Or maybe you don’t already know, as TÁR is currently only in limited release, before expanding nationwide by Oct. 28. But doesn’t that sound like a movie during which you’d like to keep your focus on the screen and not on the dullards within a 50-foot radius? I certainly would’ve loved to, yet I was faced with an insurmountable challenge in that regard: Theater etiquette is in the gutter.
I have never, ever ever walked out of a theater. It was something that I couldn’t fathom. I’ve even silently questioned people when I’ve spotted them leaving in the middle of a movie. “What’s the point?” I thought. You paid for the movie, you’re already halfway through. Unless it’s an emergency, why not just stay? I was once hungover to what I would say was a nuclear degree and still managed to not only make it to but through both hours of Nightcrawler without even running to the bathroom, despite my beverage of choice that day being a water bottle the size of my head.