A MUM has sparked debate online after her friend invited herself on her famiy holiday without asking.
The woman said she was planning a holiday with her family to celebrate her husband’s birthday, but accidentally gave her friend the impression that she was invited too, along with her two kids.
The mum said she felt bad about not wanting her friend there, particularly because she has recently been through a divorce, but also said she wanted it to be just family.
In a post on parenting forum Mumsnet, she asked if she was being unreasonable to want some family-only time.
She said: “My husband and I have two kids aged 7 and 4. We haven’t been abroad since before COVID so my little one has never been.
“It’s my husband’s 40th and so we thought we’d go away.
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“My best friend is getting divorced – she has two kids and doesn’t want to go on holiday on her own.
“She thinks she is coming with us and I keep getting ‘oh the kids will be so excited’ and ‘I’ll have to come over so we can look online together’.
“I have several issues with this, the biggest being I want us to go as a family not with her and her two kids (aged 10 and the sulkiest 14 year old on the planet).
“However I don’t want to upset her, she’s had a rough time, but I want us to have family time, particularly as it’s hubby’s 40th.
“Her ex never wanted to go on holiday now she’s rid of him she wants to go, but I don’t want them coming with us.
“We do lots of other things together but I just wanted this to be for our family.”
Plenty of people understood how the woman was feeling, but said she needed to tell her friend sooner rather than later that she was not invited on the holiday.
One said: “You’re going to need to nip this in the bud now, kindly but as clearly and thoroughly as possible.”
Another agreed, saying: “You’re going to have to put big girl pants on and tell her straight.
“‘Sorry friend I think you’ve misunderstood, when I go away with family we want it to be just us as it’s rare that we get the chance. I love you lots but our holiday is family only’.”
However, others were much sterner in their responses and said the woman had led her friend on by not telling her straight away.
One said: “This is very unfair of you. It sounds like she got crossed wires and you didn’t correct her?
“You are being unreasonable for that, and I imagine she will be both upset and embarrassed when you do.”
Another suggested she find a compromise to prevent her friend from missing out.
They said: “She’s your best friend, and saying that she’d like your company, and is a bit nervous about going on holiday as a newly single parent… maybe you could maybe arrange a trip somewhere with her and all 4 kids.”
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