I don’t know how to tell my family that my girlfriend’s 17 years older than me
DEAR DEIDRE: I’M in a secret relationship because my girlfriend is 17 years older than me.
I know neither of our conservative families would accept us.
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I’m 24 and she is 41. We met online and have been together for three years.
Although we’ve tried to stay away from each other, it doesn’t work. The more we try to deny our feelings, the stronger they become.
She is “the one” – my soulmate. Our age gap makes no difference.
I’m madly in love with her and I know she feels the same. We’ve discussed getting married and starting a family.
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I know we don’t have much time to do that, given her age.
But I don’t want to live in secret, or to keep my parents from their future grandchildren.
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DEIDRE SAYS: You’re a grown man, and who you love is your business. Hiding your relationship from your family is stressful – and may also be unnecessary.
Once they’ve got used to the idea, they will probably be happy that you’re in a committed, stable and loving relationship.
Approach the person in your family that you trust the most and admit the truth.
My support pack on Age Gaps should help you and your family to negotiate this.