DEAR DEIDRE: THE behaviour of my grown-up daughter is off the scale. She’s an irresponsible mum about to have her home taken away.
She is 34 and she has three children under eight. She has a violent boyfriend but won’t leave him.
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The kids are scared of him. He’s 40 and not their dad.
She has told me they have rent arrears of almost £3,000.
I’m her mum and 59. Her youngest has been off school with Covid and she tells me her boyfriend won’t let her or the kids have the vaccine.
I think she should make a stand but she won’t. I worry about her and the grandkids.
My partner is vulnerable and although we’ve had our jabs, I don’t want her or the kids near us while she may be carrying Covid.
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I’m worried she’ll get physically harmed by this loser boyfriend too.
Am I being selfish or over-reacting?
DEIDRE SAYS: You are not overreacting but the fact is your daughter is terrified to stand up to her partner.
Keep talking to her and keep the communication going. Ask her how you can help. She needs you even if she is not ready to admit it.
You can’t make her leave him but he is no doubt controlling her, which is so damaging for the children.
Encourage her to find help through the National Domestic Abuse Helpline (nationaldahelpline.org.uk, 0808 2000 247) and StepChange to help with their debts (stepchange.org, 0800 138 1111).
